Uncertainty

I am so tired of the uncertainty with this world. Ebola, earthquakes, prophecies all of it. I thought it was just GLP and hormones affecting me but no.
I'm tired of being near death. I am sick of us.
The world is going to utter hell around us and there is absolutely nothing any of us can do about it.
I am tired of it. I spent so much time wanting to die, now that the fear of death is actually here...I don't want to die.
I mean, I've finished a novel that I want to publish, I've got a partner, a wonderful man, not a boy who is willing to stand by me and all my madness and a baby on the way. I'm so sick of it all and I know I can't change any of it and we're all stuck on the same rock spinning around the sun. I know that but it just seems that when I'm finally getting my life together the world finally wants to take me out of it.
I'm eighteen years old and I feel like I'm losing my damned mind, counselling is not going to help me because I am ready to pack up my things, my partner and hit the hills for once and for all. I am tired of civilisation at this point.
I am so tired of the uncertainty.
Help me out here, ATS, help me out because I know that a lot of people are feeling the same way.
Peace.

a reply to: Heartisblack

i understand exactly how you feel just hang in there you need to find some peace from within yourself have you tried meditation there is still a lot of good out there but unfortunately the media only show the bad good luck your not alone

a reply to: Heartisblack

Dear Heartisblack - you are pregnant, it sounds like? You're hormones are blasting right now. But the moment you hold your little precious baby in your arms you will fall so in love your mind will blow. Your life and thoughts will be consumed by this little person that depends on you for everything.

My belief is to be prepared to the utmost but make the most of every day as it occurs to you. Enjoy each day, find the joy and beauty in each day. Do the things that calm you and make it worthwhile. Sure, have a bag ready to go, grab your family and get out of town IF the needs arises. For now just know that there are so many good people in this world and you have a long and huge life ahead of you.

As much as I used to feel like what was the point of living when there was so much doom and gloom surrounding me - and knowing prophecy - I learned that I can exist with joy and love in my life instead of dwelling on the darkness. This is a choice I made. I'm not blind to what's going on but if and when something happens then I will take the steps to deal with it then. Today is what you have been given. Tomorrow when you wake up you will have that day given to you. At night sleep and rest. And before you know it 5 months will have gone by, then two years and wow, all of a sudden you're hitting 50 and realizing you have made some awesome choices and had some fantastic times and you have a good life.

So just take it day by day. Don't let the whole great big "what if" picture cloud your life.

Here to talk anytime if you need.

Hugs girl!

a reply to: Heartisblack

With a wonderful man and a precious baby on the way you have much to live for and enjoy. Yes, we are surrounded by doom and gloom and all kinds of negativity but there are still wonderful people in the world. There is still beauty and things yet to explore and ponder. Hold on to the things that you care about and make you happy. Take one day at a time. You have your ATS family to lean on, to turn to, who will stand by your side and hold your hand through the hard times.

a reply to: Heartisblack

Hi. It sounds like your hormones are really kicking up and I feel concerned enough to urge you to see a doctor, preferably a female obstetrician. The reason is that you seem to be showing signs of depression and it sends a precursory alarm bell for post-partum depression. Why stay in that kind of hell when there is help out there? I do feel for you. Pregnancy was a difficult time for me as well, as everything was out of whack.

a reply to: aboutface

I should see a therapist, but it just seems like the doom is so overwhelming. I take a few days off here every now and then but I don't want to come back here to find out the world's been gone to hell either. You know? Trying to keep informed and sane is so hard.

a reply to: Heartisblack

do you know what the toughest job in the world is? Just for you…

You are the engine of life, the most beautiful thing in the world.

originally posted by: Heartisblack
a reply to: aboutface

I should see a therapist, but it just seems like the doom is so overwhelming. I take a few days off here every now and then but I don't want to come back here to find out the world's been gone to hell either. You know? Trying to keep informed and sane is so hard.

If it makes you feel any better, I have been listening to doom and gloom my whole life. I have heard this will happen, that will happen, the world is going to end, etc. etc. I'm 56 and we are still here

a reply to: Heartisblack

My two cents: Learn to ignore the improbable. For instance, Ebola. How many people have in in the US right now? Like 3? Okay, so that's a 1 in 100 million chance of you getting it right now, if you're in the US. The odds are way higher of winning the lottery, becoming a movie star, or any other number of WONDERFUL things. Scary things sell newspapers and starts conversations on sites like this, but they shouldn't rule your mind.

I don't expect you to listen to or agree anything i say below because when I was 18..not that long ago , I thought the same thing..Omg, my life is hell..I am forever suspended in dusk and this is all i will ever know and life is horrible /wrists...

Growing up a bit you find life has a million wonderful and amazing things to do, see and experience.

If you want to focus on the horrible things then great, enjoy wasting the most precious thing you have to offer someone which is your life and energy.

If you want to try and enjoy life then open your eyes , stop believing ridiculous "the CIANSAMASONs+TPTB created ebola to kill everyone "posts that you read on this site or other places on the web.. Look there are horrible things out there, terrible , bad, depressing people-places-events but that doesn't mean that everyone or everything is that way.

The world simply isn't a horrible place unless you choose to believe that is all it is.

Here is a good positive song that talks that sort of gets that message across.



Lightning splits the sky
Shining blinding white
And here I lie almost asleep
Reckoning in a place of peace

And I feel
I found my place
In time and space
In hope and faith
And love I give
My mind is clear
I have no fear
I shed no tears
For you my dear

This world is wonderful, so beautiful
If only you can open up your mind and see

Your world is everything you ever dreamed of
If only you can open up your mind and see

The beauty that is here

a reply to: Heartisblack

It's actually not as bad as you think. And every time you think it's getting worse, it can still be worse.
It's always been like this. I'm over 30, or around there? It's been impending doom since 1999... For me anyway.

The World isn't pointless.
You're just looking at too much of it.

Besides wait till you lose your job and your apartment and your girlfriend of 4 years.
Then Ebola looks like a lil bitch.
Society is the best game in town,
and.



You are more important than that.

Our preconceived notions of security and stability have always been a lie.
We're born, we live, we die.
Earth constantly changes.
People in our lives constantly change.
It's chaos on a global scale.
Just like it always has been.
The only difference is that we now get to hear about it 24/7.
Nothing has changed except for the non-stop news feed.

Chaos has always been the reality.
No need to be upset over a peaceful, ordered world that never really existed any way.

Unplug. Take a walk. Read a book. Give yourself a break.
Go to the pet store and play with a puppy.
Always cheers me up.

Better yet, go to the pet store, get a little fish tank and some pretty fish. It helps me.