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And this is where entitlement attitudes begin...

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posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 01:07 AM
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originally posted by: onequestion
a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed

A violent response isn't the point of standing up to bullying the point is teaching your kids to stand up for themselves and sometimes you have no choice but that's a stop gap measure.

Actually disciplining your kids with a martial art has a tendency to have the opposite affect. It's very counter intuitive. It's something I've witnessed many times in the gym.




agreed...bullying comes in many forms....

this thread has my interest as my boy will be starting school next year and i fully intend on teaching him how to defend himself.....when i believe he is ready i will teach him what i have learn't (that would be wing chun) and when the time comes he will learn more from a real instructor....hopefully it will serve him well.....he is a well adjusted sweet child and hopefully he remains that way




posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 01:07 AM
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I still think that they are perpetuatingassive aggressive behavior and that this is where the entitlement atitude begins. The victim mentality.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 01:10 AM
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a reply to: hopenotfeariswhatweneed

Honestly I learned more about perseverance, responsability, discipline and myself in general my first few years boxing then probably the 17 years before that.
I think it was the grueling nature of the sport. It's literally turned the volume down on everything else in my life.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 01:25 AM
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a reply to: onequestion
This is a weird one for me...
I was raised NOT to get in trouble...
If I got in trouble (at school, was about the only place that might happen), I could expect a "double portion" at home.
I was told - "turn the other cheek", and "give them also your cloak"...
If, though, I returned home without my cloak...and/or two bruised cheeks, I was firmly reprimanded, scolded, and/or beaten...
Weirdness abounds in this world.
I sort of believed that...any such 'adversarial encounters' were simply a test of whether I had attained to the status that "God" would stand up for me...as was done for other Biblical heroes (Elijah, Elisha, David, etc...), and rain fire "from on high" upon my enemies...
Never happened...
At some point, I guess it was obvious that I would never attain to such honors...and finally - took the leap...and found that I could actually...fight (I had always fought with my brother...
).



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 02:27 AM
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originally posted by: onequestion
a reply to: Bluesma

It's a thin veil between right and wrong and finding good martial arts coaches should be paramount if you choose to take that approach.

Also understanding as a parent that they need to I stil a sense of discipline and caution when employing such techniques.

The real way to do it is not teach them martial arts with the intent of standing up to bully's, teach them martial arts, and the. Separately teach them how to stand up to bully's not combine the two.


Perhaps I need to clarify- I never suggested at any point that this was in order to defend themselves against bullies.
The goal was for them to develop self confidence. To develop a healthy mind -body relationship.

The rest of ones education and environment is influencial.... but when you also have a mother that teaches you mediation early, gives you spiritual literature to read, and teaches you the importance of empathy, you are more likely to have a balance between the aggressive and passive energies than if you just get violent video games and martial arts skills!



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 02:49 AM
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I am seriously so sick of the way people throw the phrase "personal responsibility" around over every scenario here, where it applies or not.

By not having your child's back, you are breeding insecurity not personal responsibility. No one ever came to my defense as a kid, I had to learn to stand on my own two feet at way too young of an age and the only thing it did for me was make me feel vulnerable and insecure.

I probably would have been braver and more willing to stand up for myself if I had a safety net in the way of having someone at my back. Instead I was too afraid of failing and making things worse so I didn't try, I ran.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 02:56 AM
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A nation of cowards, raised by negligent parents, in a country left in ruins by boomers.
Every generation since WW2 has been bad. But this is to be expected, since generations occur in cycles, and we are in the decline of that cycle. This is not mystical at all, but a very real recurring theme in history.
Aurini explains it crisply, and why it is a problem for us living today:




posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 03:16 AM
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Yes you are right the very foundation of how to deal with this phenomenon is way of mark. Its not only about being strong its about being wise and knowing how to brake through the whole deception of bulling. Once we really look at the subject we realize we are being bullied all down the line. Below is a guide for a different way of viewing the problem.
issuu.com..." target="_blank" class="postlink" rel="nofollow"> issuu.com...

a reply to: onequestion


edit on 11-10-2014 by ancientthunder because: link messy

edit on 11-10-2014 by ancientthunder because: (no reason given)

edit on 11-10-2014 by ancientthunder because: link messy



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 04:05 AM
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The real irony of my daughter's situation was that she used what she had learned in a self-defense course the previous summer. It was a summer workshop class offered for high school and college girls at the local university. When she was attacked from behind she simply used a move she had been taught to stop the attack.
According to the principal the only proper behavior when attacked from behind is to fall to the ground and call for help.
None of our kids were ever bullied in school. They just didn't let the bullies intimidate them. Beyond being smart-mouthed to teachers our kids were never in trouble in school until the youngest was attacked and got sent to the principal's office for violence.... I was perfectly willing to go to battle with the administration for her rights but she blew it off as a lesson learned. She handled the whole incident with far more dignity and grace than I ever could have at that age. She looked me in the eye and said, "Who was it that taught me to ask, 'Will it matter in a hundred years?' Mom, it won't matter this time next week. She's gone, and it wasn't even me she was mad at. Mr. W--- is wrong. He has to deal with it. I did what I thought was best at the time."
Maybe being the youngest of a mixed family of five had something to do with her attitude.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 05:46 AM
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a reply to: onequestion

Dude you need to chill. America is not lacking in "fighters". We have far too many. It's just they all believe in being amoral or immoral. There's no lack of violence in this country.

Change this time around will not be violent. Look at Gandhi or MLK. Violence improves nothing. Sounds to me like you're projecting your inner anger. Chill the # out. Love is what we need now not more hate.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 05:49 AM
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a reply to: alexball

Video is too long to watch right now but what the #. Is that Kane from command and conquer? Are we in command and conquer now? Is Tiberium the real threat that's coming?



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 05:55 AM
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originally posted by: U4ea82
a reply to: onequestion

I don't believe children should have to defend themselves from bullies in an environment that is supposed to be nurturing. Children go to school to get an education, not to learn self defense. While I agree with you that standing up for yourself is extremely important there are times when I do feel it's a parent's job to step in and be an advocate for their child.



I remember some bullies in JR high. If you stood up to these guys you were going to get your azz kicked. They were rather nasty, mean and probably shouldn't have been in school considering their sociopathic behavior. But then it was a whole different sort of bully back in those days.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 05:58 AM
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Why aren't they teaching this kid how to gain enough confidence to stand up to this bully on his own?


Because some people are naturally unable to defend themselves.

And in this climate of "gangster/thug" culture, you think it would be wise to stand up to a bully without backup when that's precisely how they will operate, they will come back with a weapon and buddies and strike you at your weakest, only to laugh at you as your on the ground nearing death. They are cold.

If you are going to fight them, you're going all in. I've fought off a few bullies in my life and every single time it wasn't just simply a fight, but a bloodmatch for my right to exist without brain damage. I've had to become savage and literally scare them off with eccentric craziness and brutality.

When I was a kid my mom told me to never take physical abuse from anyone no matter who they were or what their size was, and that always stuck with me. From a very young age it was clear to me there was violence in the world and that one day it would make it's way to me, but when it did I would be prepared for it. I was thanks to that warning.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 06:01 AM
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originally posted by: alexball
A nation of cowards, raised by negligent parents, in a country left in ruins by boomers.



I cant agree with this. The "ruins" were the work of the new intellectuals, social scientists and modern schooled shrinks that bullied their way into the generational development game.

For me this is no where better demonstrated than with the unprecedented suicide rate among soldiers these days.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 06:26 AM
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originally posted by: charles1952
a reply to: onequestion

You take them out of public school if there is any conceivable way of doing it. Not a comfortable way of taking them out, any way at all.


In terms of bullying the private schools are usually worse. And of course the bullies in a private school are also usually the teachers favorite.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 07:02 AM
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Everybody has a right to live in a bully free environment without being attacked by predatory lower humans (wolves in sheep skin). Remove the wolves from the group and the group dynamic becomes different. Treat the wolf and see if it can become a productive member of society.

To those who say a single person should stand up to bullies (a group dynamic where you are alone against the majority) have you yourself been the single one where against 60% of the group that are mindless followers of the predatory alpha wolfs and the other 30% are just trying to keep out of the way and not become the target of the insane group dynamic.

Standing up to one bully who have no support is easy. Standing up to a group that controls the majority thru fear that support each other over several age groups is harder. Walk in their shoes before calling this an entitlement attitude.
edit on 11-10-2014 by LittleByLittle because: (no reason given)



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 09:43 AM
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a reply to: Hefficide

Here in Pennsylvania, I've been convicted of simple assault for defending an innocent women against an attacker. She wouldn't press charges on him and because I injured him more and had no injuries, the cops wouldn't let me file charges on him, yet would accept him filing charges on me. They expect us to bury our heads in the sand while innocent people are violated and to turn tail and run. The only way you are justified in PA for defending yourself is if you are cornered with no other options or you are wealthy.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 09:44 AM
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a reply to: SkepticOverlord

It doesn't matter any more. Now, they have school courts that have jurisdiction over whatever a child does wherever they are. If two children get into a fight on private property, they can be penalized for it in school later on.



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 11:07 AM
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originally posted by: onequestion
I still think that they are perpetuatingassive aggressive behavior and that this is where the entitlement atitude begins. The victim mentality.


Movies like Shane come to mind...

If social engineers wanted more Shane-types straightening things up, they'd stay with that theme?

I believe tv shows today like big brother, and survivor etc. are geared more toward a disconnect of emotional bonds/ethical behavior between peers. ...reward handsomely for being the most potent sociopath...



posted on Oct, 11 2014 @ 11:23 AM
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a reply to: Hefficide

Not only that, but we don't even understand brain chemistry or personality well enough to rely on a one-size-fits-all fix for bullying. Some kids seem to take to "standing up for themselves" with little or no guidance, while some are plagued with doubt and insecurity and can't seem to "buck up" no matter how much we talk to them about it.

I suspect the problem is far more complicated than the OP's personal experiences would seem to indicate, and this is *before* we talk about legal ramifications to "standing up to the bullies" verbally and / or physically.



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