a reply to: Domo1
1st off - quit the "candy ass" mentality. Everyone has anxieties. Many people, not all in this case, have anxiety disorders. By "disorder", I mean
irrational, getting in the way of normal things, a burden. Myself, for instance.
A bit of info before I go on...Public speaking, or being in something like a "safety meeting" at work, is something that scares the every living poop
out of me. Lots of people are scared of it. Myself, well, I do weird things in those situations. I start thinking that I've got to be calm first and
foremost, but then I focus on my elevated heart rate. Can they see my heart beating 100+ bpms through my shirt, I ask myself? What If I pose and try
to LOOK relaxed? Well, now I'm fixated on the location of my feet. Am I moving them too much? Too little? Are they in the right position? I try to
lighten up and act naturally - maybe a head scratch would do to make it seem like I'm not totally posturing. I then scratch my head 20 times in the
course of the meeting. I go onto some other action that would make it look like I'm bored and not totally immersed in this meeting and the fact that
I'm there, and so is everyone, and everyone has peripheral vision, and since I can see them in mine, they can see me and before I know I'm back home
on the computer on a post like this, talking about how I feel in these situation and now I feel like I am in one currently.
In cases like that, I get so nervous just trying to be ignored that I can't control how wide my eyes are open, if someone looks at me unexpectedly, my
neck muscles contract and my head shakes like a shiver.
I've never conquered all of my anxieties. I've conquered some crippling ones, and I've conquered some miniscule ones.
What helps is to first realize that other people, many people in the 7 billion+ population, feel what you feel. Maybe not about the same things, but
they feel it.
2ndly, I sometimes try to break the ice. Sometimes I'll crack a joke and people will laugh and that breaks the ice. The anxiety is still there, but
now people know I'm not on the verge of running out of the room like a crackhead like I think they think I am about to do.
3rdly, I try to expose myself to these horrible situations, to desensitize myself. Perhaps a minor victory, but in these situations, my hands and feet
no longer go numb. Much of these symptoms are over awareness. Lets say you hurt your elbow, and it is in pain. Your elbow is trying to get your
attention, making you think about it so you can help make it feel better. When you freak out and think about your elbow, you become overly aware of
your elbow and your elbow might just start hurting on its own. It is a vicious cycle. This applies to numb hands, chest pains, headaches.
4thly, realize it is mostly all in your head.
5thly, realize that there is no deus ex machina in these situations. Time is what heals everything.
All of this may not apply to your own situation, and so I am sorry, but I have other anxieties and these help with those. I'll be watching this
thread. I know I have more to say but I can't put these thoughts into words right now. Long day at work yadda yadda.
edit on AMpAmerica/ChicagoTue, 23 Sep 2014 00:19:51 -050030000000Tue, 23 Sep 2014 00:19:51 -0500America/Chicago by Aperture because: (no