internet and parents

i think that parents should not let children have access to the internet.too many things involded.bad internet practices come down too having children playing with a machine that only adults should be entertaining themshelves with.why do some parents let them have access?what is it something to baby sit them with.this like the t.v all over again expect bad people can lure them into dangerous places and hurt children.why has anyone not stood up and protect there children.to interact with the possiblity of a child molster is very scary.i dont think if i was a child i would want to go talk to strangers on a computer.now internet has good side but i think development of kids minds dont need this bombardment of adult additudes.so when you read this do you think this is right or wrong.i can find lots of bad storys on the internet of adults beings taken advantge of.reform start in your home not hollywood .

The internet can be a source of good information providing the right sites are accessed. Children can learn a lot of useful things, things that can help with their schooling.
You are right about the dangers of the net, the pedophiles and other predators, but if the parents monitor carefully what their children access, use the relevant child-safe anti-porn software and educate them in the use of the internet, it can be a valuable tool.

My kids were not allowed unrestricted access to the Internet until they were 18.

I explained why (I moderated other boards and gave them some hard examples -- including how a kid's presence and a parent's complaint shut down a board that was fun and harmless.) They had rules that they were to follow... and since I'm a computer geeky, they knew better than to break them.

Once they were 18, I gave them unrestricted access. I told them I would not honor any purchases and warned them within an inch of their lives about business scams. And then I let them have the access and didn't monitor.

Byrd.
Exactly my point. Of course kids need also to learn how to differentiate between good, useful sites and those that are just rattling off a mixture of propaganda and/or urban myths. But thats one of the reasons why ATS is so useful. Deny ignorance. I think that everyone planning to use the net for schooling or research should have to join ATS beforehand.

I don't have any problem with parents limiting internet access for their kids. In fact I believe parents should do so. I just don't want laws passed that restrict access for everyone else too.

flukemol, please try and use some spaces and sentence structure if possible.

As for your topic:
You are correct to a point. The internet can be a great resource for things. I only wish I had it when I was younger.

The child molesters and stuff like that are out there, sure. But law enforcement works pretty damn hard at catching those guys already. Plus, parents should already be teaching kids to watch out for people like that, whether it's online or on the streets.

There is a HUGE PORN MARKET though. But that too can be pretty well restricted. Parents just need to make sure they can stay a step ahead of their kids.

I do agree with you though, that parents tend to use either TV or Game Machines or whatever instead of doing their jobs and teaching their kids how to become adults. It really makes me sick too. But they were probably raised the same way and are just hopelessly lost in how to be a good parent.

What ever happened to the good old days of picking up walnuts after school, raking leaves, doing the dishes, mowing the lawn, etc. That kind of thing makes a big difference later on!!

This has been a major source of conflict between me and my wife, I don't let the kids get on the computer, and she wants to let them have their own computer and internet. There have been some pretty heated arguements between us on this subject but I just can't let the kids get on the net and feel good about it. She thinks I am being an arse about it, was glad to see Byrd's post, I'm not the only parent who feels this way. She can't see that I am not trying to be oppressive (sigh). I agree 100% with you Byrd, once their 18, fine let them have the net and more power to them, but until they reach adulthood I am morally and legally responsible for what they will find out there in the big WWW.'s and I can't in good conscience let them loose. It isn't people so much I worry about as content, and even the best parental filters out there aren't going to screen out some of the crap. I just really don't want my kids reading up on beastiality or seeing exposes of gun shot wounds until they are adults. When they grow up, sure the internet is the most wonderful thing that possibly ever happened to our species, but as a parent, I know it is also in the same breath, possibly the worst thing as well.

My kids have their own pc but no internet access. We allow them monitored and restricted access through our pc for both research for school assignments ,projects etc and just fun learning from time to time.
We do not use either the web or tv to "babysit" our kids. they go out and play just as we did, care for the pets, and engage in various extra curricular activity, sport, horseriding, etc etc etc.
They cannot have access without our knowledge since we have various passwords just to log on. We do use a filter and physically supervise our kids while they surf their favorits. They cannot surf indescriminatly and they respect that. If they tell us of a site they wish to visit, we check it out, while they are sleeping and add it to their favorits.
We use msn and they chat to their freinds online, we know who they are, and the kids arnt allowed to add anyone unless we know them. Anyone not already on this list is blocked.
There are no doubt many dangers kids are exposed to with unlimited/unmonitored access to the web, however with common sense and guidence its a powerful tool and educational. Trust shows you respect your kids. The opportunity to show they can be trusted and excersise common sense is, imo, vital to their emotional growth and developement.
You cannot hide from every danger all your life, that is not freedom.

There's no way that I would ever let my kids have unrestricted Internet access. I currently use a router that restricts their 2 computers to only the sites that I add to a list. I find this system works well. They can be on the Internet anytime they wish (Within reason) and I don't have to sit over their shoulder watching their every move. If they run into something else that they wish to see, I check it out and add it to their list if I think it's okay.

It's not that you have to add in every single url there is. My son was researching Volcanoes, and I added in "http://www.usgs.gov/*" to thier allow list. Now he can roam the entire USGS site. You can even allow just specific portions of a domain by making the filter string more specific. Technology is your friend.

[edit on 7-12-2004 by dbates]

i favor restricted access, increasingly less restricted as they get older. im 17, and ive had unrestricted access for 4 years or so. i will admit, however, that i am more capable, intelligent, and sensible than your average adult *blush*

the internet is a fantastic source of everything, other than sunlight (although, you can buy a sun lamp). yes, there are bad people and bad things out there, all it takes is a little common sense to avoid them. just dont be stupid. dont meet someone, decide five minutes later to give your address and then go have a beer with em. it just doesnt make sense. for the most part, its fine.

par exemple, ATS. i would gladly (minus plane fare) meet with people on currently on ATS because there is a definite face behind the avatar. you cant just get on ats, you have to work hard at it, and then you become known and trusted. i wouldnt chill with you, flukemol, but id hang with plenty of others (if theyd have me) because i can see by their point count and more importantly their work that they are here for ATS, not to prey on kids.

irc. i know when i join #lesbians, i know they're all men. i know when i log onto irc.ambrosia.net, most are men (minus jshei and some others) and i know hector is a bot. i wont meet any of them yet, but you cant have 40 people working with you, there isnt enough amory to go around!

in short, i favor the internet. stagger the ability given to kids, because there is stuff out there they dont need. i do believe that by 15 or 16, however, most can handle any situation. jsut dont give em ur credit card.

I've had unrestricted unmonitored access since I was 13. I don't think I'm going to treat my children any differently, even knowing what is out there. The internet mirrors the real world. If they want to look at porn and they don't look at it on the internet, they'll see it at their friend Bobby's house after he finds his father's stash. I looked at it, and it wasn't the end of the world. The internet has taught me more than I ever would have been capable of learning in the isolation that I was raised into, living 3 miles outside of a tiny town in the country (and I'm not talking about pornography).

Eventually parents/schools are going to have to let off the choke chains they have on their childrens' freedom and let them live and grow, else the current trends we're seeing are going to continue or maybe worsen. When my Father was eight years old he rode his bike a few miles away to the downtown area and wandered around factories all day. Now any eight year old is fortunate if he/she is trusted to cross the street alone. Is it because they can't, or because their parents can't deal with them growing up? The longer you restrict a child and make decisions for them, the less of a right you have to complain when they've graduated from High School and become today's stereotypical clueless idiot.

i thank you all your thoughts on this subject.it something the government in the future will have to right laws about.for i see many areas that need more attention.internet is a great tool of communication and hope it solves problems in the future flukemol..............

I forgot to add up there - and the edit button seems to have disappeared - I'm 20 years old now.

Back when I was 13 adults were always telling me to grow up while trying to keep me from doing things that only grown-up people inherently do. Odd in hindsight, isn't it?

I believe that anyone over the age of 10 should have partially restricted access, by which I mean no chatting unless the parent deems the site safe for them to do so, in my opinion if a person wants to go look at pornography you should just let them, its all around us anyway, the main reason alot of kids sneak onto porn sights is because they dont always know everything about sex/uality, if they are brought up knowing about the reproductive process and things about sex at an early age theres less of a chance they'll go on porn sites, A friend of mine recently went to australia and near the Airport there was a bill board with an erect penis on it with a no sign (like the ones you see for no smoking) and underneath an erect penis with a condom on with a green check mark next to it, under the picturew it said something along lines of "Dont forget to dress your dick for the date, anyways I agree, alot of parents dont want there kids on line because they dont want them to grow up, but thats life.
Also I say this from an unbiased neutral position since I'm A-sexual.

hehe i honestly dont even have kids yet, but the sign cracks me up *above poster*

I've been using the internet without any restriction sinse about 4 years ago (when I was 12). Of course by now I know all of the dangers the internet has to offer. I believe you should let your children have unrestricted access to the net. Why? If you teach your children not to take candy from strangers, they won't go off meeting some guy/girl in real life that they met online. It's common sense that if you give your children good parenting they can protect themseleves from these dangers.

And for the pornographic material that is online. I bet most of the adults on this forums read adult megazines or similar things when they were young. Would you rather have your kid stealing megazines or just watching porn from their computer? Of course you want neither, but what are you going to do about it? You can't control or watch your children's every movement.

I think a lot of that is just exaggerated by our media.

I've never owned any porn when I was younger. I didn't know anyone who did. I knew a very few friends who did own porn, the rest of my friends would be astonished and captivated by the porn. You could see the glimmer in their eyes (not the kind of glimmer that would be there if they owned their own porn).

Yeah, I think it's exaggerated. The internet has definitely facilitated access to porn. No use denying it.

I think kids over ....13 should be able to use the internet unsupervised. Maybe with a porn blocker, but that's about it.

[edit on 9-12-2004 by Plato986]