Why You Shouldn't Report Sexual Harassment

Sounds crazy, right? But apparently cbsnews.com thought it would be appropriate to run an online article by just that name.

In fact, smart women don't file formal complaints against ordinary harassment. They either ignore it or handle it on their own.

Another thing is that it's very easy for the company to fire a woman who complains.

Harassment is an unfortunate part of climbing the ladder.

The bottom line for a woman, though, is that if you want to have a career of increasing power, you are going to have to keep quiet about the harassment.

it becomes clear that you will have to put up with it

Apparently this article has been up for over 3 years. I can't believe I'm seeing this nonsense, and especially that a news company is promoting it by allowing it to remain. I actually found this on change.org, there's a petition up to have CBS remove the article and apologize.

Source @ cbsnews.com

a reply to: trollz

I'm annoyed with the article for 2 reasons. Reason one sexual harassment should never be lets go in my personal opinion. Reason two would be that most work places are abusive in the sense that most employers require you do things outside of your work description. I'd like to see more to the article I guess...

a reply to: Antipathy17

I agree. Sexual harassment should never be tolerated for any reason.

The title is misleading.

Some do not know where to draw the line, there are often many bogus HR claims in all large firms.

For an example a secretary that is overly flirty and touchy with certain co-workers may file HR sexual harassment suit against another co-worker that she does not like for something simple, like he made an overtly sexual comment that may only be half true or just pure malarkey.

This happens often. I feel like that some women may not even realize how flirty(words and body language/touching) they are toward the men they are attracted to.

a reply to: trollz

Well at the moment they are very busy covering wife and girlfriend beating. Besides, T&A is in full swing on TV news these days.......ok not Dianne Sawyer or Andréa Mitchell but a host of lean and mean beauty queens. And some other queens but we wont get into that right now. And no, Rachel Maddow is sexy in a tom boyish sort of way but she proly don't have to worry about SH over where she works.

Did anyone actually read the article? It's an op ed by a woman. And she goes on to say how it's possible to leverage inappropriate behaviour to get yourself a better position and get the person who was inappropriate fired. She also states that most harassment will end simply by saying something because the guy isn't aware of what he's doing.

It's not a guide on how to rub your tits in your bosses face...

There's a right way and a wrong way to deal with sexual harassment. Unfortunately, dealing directly with sexual harassment means people are going to be forced to put on their PC hat. You force management to do something ... and you'll reap the whirlwind. Let's not be coy about this. The best way to deal with SH is to handle it in a mature manner.

Some people bring it on themselves. I have no sympathy for 'that type'. If you can't run with the big dogs, better stay on the porch.

Some others go through 'official channels' (and I have no beef with that). They usually lose. Sucks ... but I've seen it time after time.

Others dime the offending party out in front of the right people. The offending party is finished. It just takes a bit of time.

There's a dose of reality. Ignorance denied.

a reply to: boncho

You're right, the article is stating facts. Laws concerning this are ineffective, so it's up to the individual woman as to how to proceed. If she wants to move up the ladder she needs to make mental notes of who did what and when and then use those instances to her advantage later on. For instance, on my smartphone I have an app that when you open it and push a button, it starts recording the audio signals around the phone. Just because she doesn't report an instance on the day it happens, that doesn't mean that she's tolerating it. It may mean that she's lying in wait.......gathering information.......waiting for the time to best play that card. It happens a lot.

Anyone who knows women know that they are more capable of doing that then men are. And the more they want to move up the ladder, the less guilty they are going to feel when they let men do and say what they want for the purpose of using those actions against them at a later date.

IMO, men who sexually harass women in the workplace are idiots.

I'll share a personal experience from many moons ago when I was just a wee lad fresh out of High school


I was working part time at a retail establishment as a cashier. On my last day I witnessed the Assistant Manager and a long time 'Star' employee [Both female] making crude and very suggestive comments about this blonde haired beach bum hunky type surfer 'Dude" applying for a position with the company he had just left after being there for an interview.

Being young and out spoken, I chimed and said something to effect

"I thought only us guys were crude" they both just stared at me.

An hour or so later I was called in by the Assistant manager and given a warning for saying something 'Inappropriate' on the sales floor. I just looked at her, stood up and tossed my name badge on her desk and walked away.

I keep my mouth shut at work and just work.

originally posted by: trollz
Sounds crazy, right? But apparently cbsnews.com thought it would be appropriate to run an online article by just that name.

In fact, smart women don't file formal complaints against ordinary harassment. They either ignore it or handle it on their own.

Another thing is that it's very easy for the company to fire a woman who complains.

Harassment is an unfortunate part of climbing the ladder.

The bottom line for a woman, though, is that if you want to have a career of increasing power, you are going to have to keep quiet about the harassment.

it becomes clear that you will have to put up with it

Apparently this article has been up for over 3 years. I can't believe I'm seeing this nonsense, and especially that a news company is promoting it by allowing it to remain. I actually found this on change.org, there's a petition up to have CBS remove the article and apologize.

Source @ cbsnews.com

I get the impression the author of this article is telling women that most companies are sexist and that they will be better off dealing with it themselves rather than reporting it. #ty situation but until they find a way to weed out those that use their gender as a weapon to remove the competition they are just going to get rid of women that threaten their human assets. Nobody wants to lose skilled workers and too many accusations occur for them to feel safe allowing females into the upper fold. They know that either the men wont be able to handle it or that a female is going to out the competition for her own personal gain.

like I said # situation

Sexual harassment? how do you know if you're going to get any if you don't ask? ....

But seriously like many subjects there really isn't one fit all action to respond to SH. I'm guessing by definition "harassment"
would entail more than a couple comments by an individual towards a co worker.

I would think people in low paying jobs should have more recourse through an HR dept. I say that because they really have few options to rise up in the corporate ladder and could be more subject to horny bosses that think they control their paychecks. whereas a smart professional woman probably has a few more wits about her and can choose several avenues of action.

It is a touchy subject ( no pun intended) but if women can wear skirts and low cut shirts to work revealing cleavage they are almost asking for comments if not learing eyes.

Not having boobs myself, is it impossible for a woman to button a shirt up to her neck like most business men do?
If a woman is showing an exceptional amount of her breasts is it wrong for a man to comment on them? would it be wrong if the man said to her"why don't you put those away"

If a man did comment on some exposed breasts to a women is that sexual harassment? one comment isn't harassment...

I do realize this is a complex and serious issue and not making lite of it.
I work in the building trades. One time a guy showed a playboy centerfold to a female worker and asked her opinion of it...as he was walking away she took off her hard hat and turtle f**ked the guy...whacked him on his hard hat... put him to his knees...

Worked at a place, male manager was having affair with female assistant manager. She was robbing the place hand over. Higher ups came in and put the manager on the line.......find the source of the flow or you are fired. Well he thought he and the assistant were going to live in la la land someday so he covered her azz and took the fall. She dumped him several days later.

Upper management couldn't come right in and fire her when they understood the full story as she could claim SH, although in reality there was no SH but more like sexual manipulation on her part. So she remained and remained stealing. Higher ups let some time pass and as if ignorant enticed her to move to another store where they watched her and built their case. They had to let 2 years pass, allowing for distance, before they could make a clean break with her.

a reply to: theyknowwhoyouare

I get the impression the author of this article is telling women that most companies are sexist and that they will be better off dealing with it themselves rather than reporting it.

Women know right away if they were hired for their looks. They play the game. Everyone knows. Any manager worth his salt knows what's going on and how to deal with it.

I don't hire 'eye candy' because it's not worth the time or trouble. Besides ... they'll wind up plying their wares on the streets soon enough. Sucks to be her if she's not qualified for employment ... doesn't it?

a reply to: trollz

You know, when I was younger (like 20s and 30s) I kept hoping I would be sexually harassed at work, specially by this one specific woman.... but nothing ever happened......

I was sooo disappointed.

Men are from Mars. Women are from ?

My humor is from waaaaaayyy out there. lol

a reply to: trollz

It's an opinion piece, not an article by CBS.

She makes some interesting points, and some stupid ones, IMO. But I wouldn't take the piece seriously.

a reply to: trollz

Hrmmm, I disagree with CBS on their assessment. My sister did actually complain about sexual harassment that she received from a fellow financial institution executive. Smart women handle it on their own alright until it's quite clear that it takes an intervention. She was a CFO being sexually harassed by a CEO. She reported it to the board and left. She actually made a huge stink about it. She's currently an exec (VP) for yet another large financial institution that is much larger than the one that she was sexually harassed at. The other financial institution where she got harassed at is now defunct.

Smart companies understand that in order to keep smart employees, then one should make sure that the people that they have at the top are smart and are willing to stick around. Bad environments or intolerable situations can make a smart employee walk out the door and they will. How smart do you think the execs of that now defunct financial institution were if their institution didn't survive the 2008 financial crisis?

Not too smart.

originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: Antipathy17

I agree. Sexual harassment should never be tolerated for any reason.

Of course it shouldn't. However, there are many frivolous claims of sexual harassment as well--claims that even if unfounded can hurt people who did nothing because jus the accusation can ruin careers.

We should address and punish REAL sexual harassment, not false or silly claims of it.

originally posted by: NavyDoc

originally posted by: Night Star
a reply to: Antipathy17

I agree. Sexual harassment should never be tolerated for any reason.

Of course it shouldn't. However, there are many frivolous claims of sexual harassment as well--claims that even if unfounded can hurt people who did nothing because jus the accusation can ruin careers.

We should address and punish REAL sexual harassment, not false or silly claims of it.

I was reported for phoning and looking at a female co-worker.

She was the receptionist and switchboard operator.

I got an official warning and I don't know what other 'considerations'. My name was definitely Mudd.

When I had a chance to speak to my accuser some months later I tried to explain that I never meant to bother her, but she said I hadn't done anything and that she had been on psychoactive meds and had been seeing and hearing things which weren't real!

Do you think she ever told management that?