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Hello, my name is [David]. I received your contact information through a mutual acquaintance who assures me that you are well equipped to investigate peculiar problems. Furthermore, I believe you may have interest in these events beyond any compensation that I am prepared to deliver in order to have these issues sorted.
For the past 6 months I have been living in a rural home located on the border of West Virginia and Kentucky where my family is nightly assaulted by creatures that I have come to believe are of an extraterrestrial origin. These beings appear to be the size and stature of a small child, devoid of any facial features save for large, oily eyes and lipless mouths. They frighten my children by peering through their bedroom windows, chirping at one another. They actively attempt to enter my home in the middle of the night. Last month they took my dog. The police refuse to provide any further assistance, attributing the problems to wild animals and forwarding my complaints to the state game commission.
I believe they are coming from an abandoned mine located on the edge of my property. Though I’m armed, I’m afraid that I’m far too frightened to enter the mine by my lonesome, and cannot convince any sympathetic friends to accompany me, though I cannot blame them. I am convinced that the only answer is to collapse the mine.
I believe this is where we can be mutually beneficial to one another. If you are prepared to assist me in this matter, I can offer you permission to record and document these events under the condition of anonymity. I can guarantee you evidence of these creatures which I assure you are not “wild animals”.
Please respond ASAP. Thank you.