Petey - I am going through something very very similar. Let me explain my story before I give you some advice.
I was at a little gathering of friends back in 2001, the nite before Easter, at my bothers residence when I met a girl, who at the time I never
thought anything would come of it. We talked all nite long about anything and everything, and when morning came, we went our separate ways. Sure, I
had feelings for her after that night, but I didn't expect anything to come of it because of the situation. She goes to college 16 hours away. After
that nite, I really thought nothing of it. My brother was kind of seeing her friend at the time and when she came home from college in the summer, we
all ended up hanging out. After awhile, you couldn't separate us, but we were only friends. When the summer ended, and it was time for her to go back
to school did we realize that we had deeper feelings for each other but we were both scared of what might come because she is gone 8 months out of a
year and everyone knows that long distance relationships don't work out, at least thats what we had told ourselves. But after she left, our
relationship grew even more. I luckily had a chance to go and visit her and after that, we had fallen for each other, very very hard. But that damn
feeling of having a long distance relationship stayed with us both and kept us skeptical for ahwile. For me, it was the trust issue. I know that I am
and always have been faithful, but I also knew what college can be like for people (I had already graduated from college, so I know what happens in
). College is a learning experience for a lot of people and they do things that they might not think about at the time. But after the first
year, we had grown so much together and both fell in love with each other. It got to the point where I could trust her and she could trust me and it
has been wonderful ever since. She is still attending college (our relationship is going on 3+ years now) and our relationship is stronger now than
The key to long distance relationships is being patient and having trust for each other. I had the same thought process as you had: If she were to
find someone else (and I even told her this many times) than she should pursure that interest. But she was willing to make a commitment and so was I
and here we are, 3 1/2 years later, still deeply in love with each.
It is very difficult not being able to be with each other, especially in times of needs, but it also seems that when one of us is down, the other is
there to pick us up and put us back on our feet. There are many days that I would give nothing more than to be able to hold her and embrace her, but I
also know that she is where she needs to be and I am where I need to be.
There are many days that I wish I could see her, but I know that our time will come, we just have to be patient, and be patient with each other. You
have to lose the selfishness of wanting to be with her, which is something that is very hard to deal with. But as long as you can make that
commitment, you can learn to deal with it and accept it.
Love has been a very strange thing in my life and in many others as well, but nothing has ever felt more right than being with her. And she feels the
same way. I'm sure your always hearing about how long distance relationships never work, but they can and they do. You have to find strength within
yourself and help her out by giving her that strength as well, and in return, she will do the same. Keep a positive attitude about it and accept
whatever happens. It sounds hard because I know that my heart would break if something would ever happen to us, but in the end, I just want her to be
happy and that is where I get my strength. And you can do the same.
If you truly love this person and want something more out of it, just stay positive, be patient, and give her some trust. And whatever happens in the
end, as long as you truly care for her, be happy for the fact that she is happy. If your not happy or if later on down the road you became unhappy and
you can not do this, then you need to let her know so that the both of you can move on. But don't listen to other people, long distance relationships
CAN work. If she doesn't want anything serious because of the long distance thing, then so be it. All that truly matters is that your both happy.
I hope this helps. It's hard to describe feelings and explain everything that entails a long distance relationship, but I hope this is a starting
point. I know that everyone is different and what I have is something truly special, but if you can tell your heart that you can make this work and
give it your best shot, then there is nothing you can lose even if you lose her, you will be a stronger person in the end.
I wish you the best!
If you ever need someone to talk to, look me up...I'll be around somewhere.
Peace, Love, and Happiness