Those who know me lately, or have had the (dis)pleasure of seeing recent posts of mine can gather that I’ve been going through an onslaught of
self-doubt and depression. This is not the first time in my life I’ve been haunted so. I thought I left this black cloud far, far behind many years
ago. It’s amazing how one can be on top of the world at one minute and find oneself at rock bottom the next. Sometimes we have to relearn the
lessons we already know.
These days I can’t even seem to find peace of mind enough to relax and meditate on the bothersome issues swarming around my head. The last time I
attempted to relax and meditate, I instantly got a message that I’m being pulled in too many directions with a vision of my various body parts and
limbs stretched and strewn around the room. I’m way out of spiritual alignment! As the old saying goes, ‘to find oneself, you must first lose
oneself.’ I’ve been through this lost and found before and thought I had it all figured out! I thought I had reached a state of self-worth,
stability, and command. It’s so easy to lose sight though!
In the hardest of times, wisdom has always come to me in my sleep (check my username.) Sometimes it’s a dream, sometimes it’s just a moment of
clarity—a plan, an idea, a clear course of action upon awakening—and on rarer occasions, something even more mysterious and special!
I went to bed recently and asked for an answer, an answer I desperately needed to hear—anything! Just anything to make me believe once again. Having
been without health, employment, friends, love, finances, freedom, or any glimmer of hope for my future for so long, I was beginning to feel outright
cursed and forsaken!
I woke up with an understanding. No dream took place that I can recall, but I just woke up with an internalized understanding of some very fundamental
things. It was the only time this week I didn’t have a crushing nightmare. It was instantaneous knowing, surrender, and embrace.
I’ll paraphrase: Whatever is going on, whether your worldview is spiritual, godly, atheist, humanist, scientist, pragmatist etc. or any combination
thereof—whatever is going on (life, existence, being,) it is greater than you and I. It is greater and it takes precedence over our wants and
desires. The disappointment I feel about my life is nothing but my own defiance and selfishness being thrown back in my face. What’s going on is
great and beautiful, and though I’m only a small part, I am part of this thing no less. This ‘thing’ asks for our cooperation and patience, not
for our stubbornness. It asks us to be humbled, not entitled.
I’m sure this is no great revelation or epiphany to anyone but myself. Heck, I’ve heard this message before, and so have many of you. Nothing new,
right? Well it was important for me to ‘hear’ this again, to be reminded, to have it reaffirmed from deep within. Maybe it’ll be helpful for
someone else out there to be reminded of as well.
Though it may require a bit of selfless detachment and skillful navigation on my part, I must remember that the events shaping my life are part of a
big jigsaw puzzle. I have to put my piece down whether I like it or not. I can’t just spite the entire puzzle by refusing to cooperate with the big
Take it for what it’s worth. This little pearl of wisdom has helped me through a dark time. Some may call it wishful thinking on my part, but I have
found some comfort and smiles in this realization. It's like a Chinese finger trap; the more I struggle, the tighter it binds. It’s time for me to
relax and rest in it.
However, enough of my hogwash! I’m more interested in any other ‘pearls of wisdom’ you have gotten in sleep, dreams, visions, or whatever.
(Obviously, keep this in league with T&C please.) But I am interested in the insight we derive from sleep, dreams, and other internal processes more
than chemical and mind-altering substances. Please share any experiences you have had. I’d love to hear them!
Let's share our dream wisdom!
edit on 11-8-2014 by NarcolepticBuddha because: (no reason given)