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originally posted by: jonwhite866
All my life I've felt dramatically different from everyone else. I don't see the Human race as my own, I don't see this beautiful planet as my own. I feel like an orphan would feel not knowing who their parents were. I tell you what, and this may sound really corny, but the only time I feel like I'm home is when I see space, watch documentaries about space, or watch films about space... ANYTHING TO DO WITH SPACE! Space is probably the thing I love most in life besides life itself, the idea and the thought of how much there is out there, the vast amount of possibilities there is. Where we come from, where I come from. It literally brings a tear to my eye when I lay outside in the pitch black and focus on the reality of life, looking up at the stars knowing that there could be life orbiting them.
I've always looked at myself as something more and the person I am today has not been influenced by anything, not my parents or the things I've watched on TV or witnessed in life. I feel like my personality was made independently as in, no matter what life I have, I'd always be the person I am today. I'm nothing like anyone I know or hang around with which makes me wonder who I am sometimes. I have so much care and love for living creatures and feel things people would laugh at. I'm now starting to learn to feel unconditional love as well which is something I didn't know about till early this year. I'm passionate about a lot of things mostly space and extraterrestrials along with films, film making, art and so on. I've found myself analyzing peoples behavior as well. I'd happily sit in a Starbucks all day in New York just watching how people act and the infinite ways in which this world works.
I'm also very open minded about things and am one of those people you'd feel comfortable talking to about anything. No matter how ridiculous and stupid society would see it, I'd accept it and listen as if it was real. I'd make you feel free and not crazy. What I'm saying now and am about to say, I can't talk to people about it as they'd laugh or say "it's his bull# hour again" which they do. When I start talking about theories and possibilities, my friends just say "Is it bull# hour already?" I laugh about it with them of course. I'm very open to the concept of spiritual things but I'm not religious, I accept people who are and am fine with religion I just don't agree with the way it's forced onto people. If you don't believe in this then you suffer. It seems like blackmail and doesn't abide by its own rules and it's ethics fall back on itself.
Another thing I must note is, I have a strong desire for change, in a good way of course. I also feel as if I'm apart of that change like I'm meant to do something to help accomplish it. I also feel change coming. I feel it so much that I'm confident in swearing lives on change happening. The problem is, when this world and it's system of life is the same and doesn't change, I feel anxious and annoyed, like I need it to happen for me to survive or be comfortable. I guess I've never agreed with the way Humans live in general and how they've run things for the years of their existence. I'm worried for this race and hope that their way of living takes a turn for good before it's too late as I see this race growing up to be the civilizations we fear in films, the ones that take over planets and kill species. I can see Humans being the thing they fear. They've been doing it all their life, killing for territory, destroying things, creating weapons to kill, caring only for themselves.
Anyway, I hope someone can have a nice convo with me about this as I need to talk to someone on the same wave length. I don't know who I am. I do hope this disclosure happens though, because Humans need to be shown that they're not the only ones. No matter how you look at it, Humans will never be ready for non Human contact (I don't like using the word alien) that's why they need to be contacted. Yes many people will riot and probably start to fight both themselves and the ETs that are here but there isn't another way, there may be another way but I can't think at the moment of what that is. Humans need to be able to deal with big change in an instant so that they can learn that everything is possible. I feel as if this instant shock will help people realize that not everything is stupid.
Whoever read all of this, I thank you for doing so. I'm open to any theories and comments to help me out, I just want to find myself and my purpose so that I can start doing what I'm made to do. Thank you.