posted on May, 11 2014 @ 07:46 PM
The words coming out of bullies mouths say more about their state of mind than their targets. That being said, my son has severe autism so I can
totally empathize with this reaction. When someone you care about has autism, and you know how amazing they are and how incredibly difficult it is to
be them (at least as much as you can know from the outside), it is easy to get all Momma Bear or Pappa Bear and do what you can to defend them.
("Sticks and stones will break my bones but words can never hurt me" is a nice phrase, but the truth is WORDS DO HURT. Trust me - girl-bullies have
it down to a science. The boy-bullies might threaten and punch and humiliate physically, but the girl ones seek to destroy your inner being - and
words/lies are the weapons of choice. Congrats to the people who are sophisticated enough to not be hurt by the words of others - good on you - but I
could hardly expect that of my son, who has no words of his own to fight back with.)
OP, defending the vulnerable, even if you think he did not notice the insult (which he may have btw), teaches your autistic friend that he does not
deserve such meanness from others. It lets him know they were WRONG, even if he didn't really understand the entire exchange. Ignoring the
bully-boys might even let him think it was ok for him to have meanness hurled at him. It also let the bullies know that they were not going to simply
be able to walk away unscathed and laughing at how clever they were.
It is said that boys fear weakness and being perceived as weak more than anything else - weakness is the greatest shame of all - if that is so,
perhaps we can teach that true strength comes from caring for and assisting those whose bodies have dealt them a massive challenge, and that the true
weakness is in going out of ones way to insult someone who can't fight back.
Blessings to you for the work you do - you have no idea, from a Mom's perspective, how incredibly appreciated you are. (Oh dang. I'm getting all
misty eyed here!!!) Thank you.