A simple, yet powerful formula. Once you realize how simple it is, it can be life changing.
Happiness = Reality - Expectations.
With a generation that thrives on instant gratification, expectations run rampant and have lost their proximity to and basis in reality.
The reality of the world, versus what we have been led to expect, is (in most cases) why people are so unhappy and feel like the world sucks. We have
been led to believe that the people who represent us, actually DO represent us, and therefore, we believe that all of the our expectations will be met
since they are supposed to represent them for us. Obviously that isn't true. The reality is that these people are greedy, manipulative, cunning,
diabolical and don't care about us, which is far from what we should expect. This leads to a direct feeling of unhappiness, as well as a host of other
Another example is starting a new job that you are excited about. You expect that it's going to be perfect for you. You expect to be given respect
from everyone you work with. You expect that you'll be valued as an employee. As time goes by, and you start to see reality for what it is, the gap
between your new-found reality and the expectations you had starts to change. You realize that there are people who really don't like you, and you
might not even know why. You work 70 hours a week and nobody even notices. In fact, you still get asked to do more. All of a sudden, you wake up one
day, and realize that you are very, very unhappy. The larger
gap is between reality and what you expect, the more unhappy you are.
Or one that even more people can relate to.... A new relationship. You're so happy with this new person because they show you all of their absolute
best qualities, setting an expectation for how things will be going forward. The relationship progresses, and you start to realize the reality, which
is that they have disgusting habits, or don't get along with your friends, and suddenly you find yourself unhappy.
Or... you come to ATS expecting that you'll post something that people will appreciate and enjoy reading, that it will be flagged and starred and you
will rejoice at your temporary ATS fame. Then reality hits you and you are unhappy that people don't like your post, so you go out and troll everyone
That is, unless you're the type that expects very little, and is therefore surprised and grateful for the reality you've been handed.
If the difference is negative, you're unhappy. If it's positive, you're happy. It really is that simple.
In a nutshell, it means that if you are looking for happiness, make sure that you have reasonable expectations, otherwise, you are all but guaranteed
to be left with a deficit between what you expect and what you get with reality, and will likely be left unhappy in some way.
This simple way of looking at things can really impact your happiness.
Sometimes, people just don't know themselves like they think they do. Take a personality test of some kind and find out more about yourself so you can
find ways to improve your happiness. I recommend this site for finding your potential
but there are plenty
of others out there.
My only expectation is that I wake up tomorrow breathing. As long as that happens in my reality, I'm happy.
Find your happiness by being real about your expectations and you can change your reality.
edit on 9-5-2014 by SonOfTheLawOfOne because: (no reason given)
edit on 9-5-2014 by SonOfTheLawOfOne because: