Obesephobe - could this be a new word for the 21st century?

a reply to: NoRulesAllowed

What DO YOU think is the reason 36% of Americans are OBESE (mind you, obese, NOT just "overweight")?

Hint: It has to do with lack of exercise AND the amount of food/calories intake. (Yes,it's THAT simple!).

Or could it be the additives that children are raised on including what's in their water, and the fast food that is made up of pink slime and no one seems to care. Stress hormones also cause fat. Hormonal imbalances should be common in this world today, children are not even raised they just grow up with electronics and fast food for company.

a reply to: xDeadcowx

I have noticed a huge increase in hatred for overweight people. Not that they were ever loved, but before the last few years they were mostly ignored with the exception of information about the health consequences of being over weight.

Actually it was not that long ago that a child was only cute if they were little tubs of butter. Also older folks were expected to gain girth and be homey and warm and sit and do seated chores more.

Through the ages many time periods found what we call obesity today to be attractive. It was once a symbol of wealth and prosperity making it the chosen prefered style. Style that is the word, size is following style which is manipulated exactly like clothing and hair and makeup styles. it all comes and goes.

a reply to: grainofsand

Due to personally being in favor of healthy lifestyle and trying to live like that, I would possibly have similar issue. I love working out, eating quality food, but being in a relationship with someone, who does not share the same principles on the matter, would be impossible, which is the reason I do not date obese women.

Looks do matter to me up to a certain point, but what matter the most is that the person is taking care of themselves. That shows self-respect and if one can not respect themselves, it is a very unattractive feature.

Said it before and will say it again, thick chicks are the only thing for me. I can not even look at a thin girl and consider her attractive.

This 60 year old "trend/fad/media-induced-sensation" of wanting skinny women or men is nothing compared to them history of our species that found the very opposite to be sexy and desirable.

Thousands of years of the human race wanting breeding hips and curves, vs 60 years of TV telling women that they should do anything possible to look like a 12 year old boy...hmmm...I am pretty happy with my preferences.

Everyone has a body. Thank god there are people who desire all types of bodies. That reason alone allows us all to find out mates and love in life.

What needs to end is the insults to larger people. Its a damn shame that every time I find a bigger girl I have to basically recondition her towards feeling desirable because she spent a life being judged by closed minded people who bashed her weight her entire life.

Go big or go home!

MM

The problem with inventing words like this is that they have a built-in bias themselves.

"Phobia" = "fear" which surely everyone knows.

If someone dislikes the homosexual agenda, they are called a "homophobe." Now apparently someone wants to call people who are averse to obese people "obesophobes."

If you are not attracted to something or someone, that does not mean you "fear" it. If you dislike peanut butter, does that mean you fear it? Maybe you think the smell is disgusting. Why translate a disgust of something into "fear."

The reason, of course, is because it is politically correct to do so. We've decided as a society that being a homosexual is now cool instead of disgusting. We've decided that we have a right to be gay that is as much a right as the "right" to be Black or Asian, therefore it is now covered as a "civil right" legally, in most cases.

One of the oft-heard arguments FOR homosexual tolerance is that you don't have to be, so how does that hurt you? Even if you find the prospect of two males engaging in what you consider abhorrent sexual activity and calling it "love" disgusting how does that affect you? Why is it any of your business? Of course, if you feel this way that does not mean you "fear" gay people, but the gay agenda has co-opted this word for their own benefit and successfully used it to promote "gay rights" by painting anyone who is opposed as a "phobic," i.e: unreasonable person.

But this thread takes it a notch further. Here the OP expressed a dislike to be involved (ultimately, to mate with) a person he considered too fat. He was not attracted, not sexually motivated to enter into a courtship ritual with her, yet he was accosted for expressing this to someone who was trying to set the two up.

Say what?????

Does anyone see a problem with this? Are we to be forced into relationships with people we find unattractive because it would be discriminatory not to?

If it's one thing we need liberation from, it's people dictating to us what our fears are. What we need is the right to be with people we find attractive with no explanation necessary. I like my women the way I do, and you can get your fat butt out of my life.

a reply to: thedeadtruth

ut to excuse it and make others feel bad for not just accepting Greed, Sloth and Gluttony as normal.

greed comes in many forms, most are considered good in today's western culture. When do we judge the glutton and consider someone lazy? Perfect people could do that maybe.

My daugher like you I would guess is and extreme athlete. One day her family brought her son age 10 at the time and a friend to camp near us.
My daughter said, to introduce me to her sons best friend who was playing out of earshot I hope..said, "that is Jason ,Tony's best friend... he's nice but he's fat.
To her, her son having a friend she considered overweight (to me he was husky and in no way fat) was unacceptable...to me that fact that he was a nice kid was all that mattered.

a reply to: Cabin

That shows self-respect and if one can not respect themselves, it is a very unattractive feature.

Some consider self respect, expensive hair styles, cloths a ton of makeup, having "great' style sense.

A self respecting person may BE self respecting from their own moral point of view. For instance, I don't wear makeup...most people consider this a big flaw "ie she has no self respect" because i don't paint myself!

a reply to: schuyler

He was not attracted, not sexually motivated to enter into a courtship ritual with her, yet he was accosted for expressing this to someone who was trying to set the two up.

I agree with everything you said so well, but I think this was more about a Woman not liking his choice of words toward another friend. Not that she thought he had to want a relationship with her.
No one likes to hear those kind of words, there are better ways to express ourselves.

From what i read no one called him a obesophobe or anything like that.

The fat people that I know are amazing people who are thoughtful, caring, humorous, loving, sweet...

I have dated slim, normal weight and over weight men.

originally posted by: Night Star
The fat people that I know are amazing people who are thoughtful, caring, humorous, loving, sweet...

I have dated slim, normal weight and over weight men.

Well tell the big chicks you know I said "HEEEEEEEY GIRL!"

Put a good word in for me.

MM

I had a good friend many years ago, a school teacher, she was very large. That woman never touched junk in her life! we went on a trip around the whole US together and I was stunned that she ate far less than I did. She did all the hikes and everything I did, but she did not lose any weight on our 7 week trip so I am pretty sure this was how she normally ate and exercised.

True. There are also slim and beautiful people who live on junk food and sweets and don't gain an ounce. You'll never hear a word about them 'not taking care of themselves' like you would an obese person. There are also meds that can make you gain weight. I had a friend and her daughter was always slim until going on a certain medication and she gained 30 pounds quickly.


It's one thing if you just aren't attracted to someone for whatever reason, but to say mean things is not necessary.

originally posted by: Night Star

It's one thing if you just aren't attracted to someone for whatever reason, but to say mean things is not necessary.

EXACTLY, specially when its guys like me who have to explain to a bigger girl that she is gorgeous after so many years of being bashed. Any guy who likes thicker women know the deal. There is no excuse for removing someone's right to feel comfortable in their own skin.

More than once in life I have had the pleasure of turning down thin girls who make fun of larger women. And it always is a cheap pleasure to put them in their place by saying "sorry honey, you gotta be this big to ride the ride".

MM

a reply to: Char-Lee

Of course, definitions do matter. For me personally, self-respect lies in treating yourself well for the sake of yourself. If one lets themselves go overweight, has bad hygiene, smells etc, it shows lack of self-respect as well as not thinking ahead. I am not some health nut or something, these are just basics. I do not mind having some beer or stronger alcohol sometimes, I need to quit smoking though. Bad habit I caught up, when I was younger, more stupid and well, so far haven´t managed to get rid of. This year, I will try again though and succeed this time

Good style sense or nice hairstyle is not bad per se, but not something someone should be judged by, at least I try to. Up to a certain point, knowing what is IN and what is something considered weird are somewhat good indicators of one´s social intelligence though. Many people unfortunately do judge, so in certain contexts, certain groups, these can become a valuable asset on creating a positive first impression, for example sales jobs, hr-related job, jobs having to deal with lots of people, just networking.

Although there is a difference between hair not taken care of and just a bad hairstyle. Make-up is kind of the same, the tons of make-up I keep on seeing on younger girls is not attractive at all + is bad for the skin, as it cannot breathe. Seeing all those girls, who used to wear tons of make-up (still-do), this has had an effect on their skin. I personally prefer natural looks, changing hair color is fine, but all those hair-extensions, tons of make-up and overdone nails are not attractive at all.

But well, just as I said before. what matters is having the basics fine. Everything else comes down to personal choice. Overdoing anything is not attractive, often it rather shows too external focus, the insecurities- basing one´s worth on the views from others, but good sense of style and nice hair can be very attractive traits, everything comes down to person.

Not wearing make-up rather shows confidence in my eyes than anything else.

Thanks for all the interesting replies so far. I've been enjoying an extended public holiday weekend here in the UK so I'm not really up to replying to everyone, but this did strike a chord with me:

originally posted by: beezzer
a reply to: grainofsand

Political correctness strikes again!

The new societal meme is not just to accept different lifestyles or peoples, but now you HAVE TO LIKE THEM ALSO!

1984 is here.

That is pretty much how I felt as per the discussion in the OP. I have zero problem with anyone who is fat, in fact the girl in question is a friend, but her body disgusts me to the point that I could never ever be intimate with her.

A poster or two here have suggested I should have said "I'm not attracted to her" and effectively hide my reason.
I ask why the hell should I?
If someone drank too much alcohol for me to desire entering a relationship then that apparently is OK to say, but if it is because they eat too much food, that somehow is unnacceptable.
If anyone wants to be fat then good luck to them, but I will fight against the fat lobby if they are pushing our society to hide our individual preferences as 'thought crimes'
1984?...Hmm

originally posted by: Char-Lee
a reply to: NoRulesAllowed

What DO YOU think is the reason 36% of Americans are OBESE (mind you, obese, NOT just "overweight")?

Hint: It has to do with lack of exercise AND the amount of food/calories intake. (Yes,it's THAT simple!).

Or could it be the additives that children are raised on including what's in their water, and the fast food that is made up of pink slime and no one seems to care. Stress hormones also cause fat. Hormonal imbalances should be common in this world today, children are not even raised they just grow up with electronics and fast food for company.

So it's really down to crap parenting choices as the reason for fat kids then.
You can look (desperately) for other reasons to take away the responsibility as much as you like, but the majority of fat kids are fat because their parents have failed them.

As I said previously, I eat loads of trans-fat/corn-syrup/crap food myself but I'm not fat because I use as much energy as I put in - I am not a miracle of biology - when I worked a desk job I ate less, not rocket science is it.

Fat or thin...you are all a punch of sissies

originally posted by: grainofsand

originally posted by: Char-Lee
a reply to: NoRulesAllowed

What DO YOU think is the reason 36% of Americans are OBESE (mind you, obese, NOT just "overweight")?

Hint: It has to do with lack of exercise AND the amount of food/calories intake. (Yes,it's THAT simple!).

Or could it be the additives that children are raised on including what's in their water, and the fast food that is made up of pink slime and no one seems to care. Stress hormones also cause fat. Hormonal imbalances should be common in this world today, children are not even raised they just grow up with electronics and fast food for company.

So it's really down to crap parenting choices as the reason for fat kids then.
You can look (desperately) for other reasons to take away the responsibility as much as you like, but the majority of fat kids are fat because their parents have failed them.

As I said previously, I eat loads of trans-fat/corn-syrup/crap food myself but I'm not fat because I use as much energy as I put in - I am not a miracle of biology - when I worked a desk job I ate less, not rocket science is it.

I am sure you are aware that in Families where children are taught to exercise, like my two were, it comes natural for them to keep a good weight.
There are many Families today where the kids come home like my stepson, and microwave whatever is in the house and drink soda and watch TV...there is no one there saying let's go play ball or whatever activities.

Growing up as a couch potato makes it very hard to learn new behaviors this is a big part of childhood obesity. I am stunned if you think this is not part of the overall problem today.

a reply to: LockwithnoKey
Lol, that was a rather unusual contribution to this topic.

a reply to: grainofsand

A poster or two here have suggested I should have said "I'm not attracted to her" and effectively hide my reason.
I ask why the hell should I?

For the same reason that when we grow up we don't do what my 5 year old once did and ask an old man why he was so ugly.

It is known as being mature.

a reply to: Char-Lee
So, as I said, crap parenting choices. It appears we agree.
I would be ashamed of myself if my son was obese. I would not be looking to blame anyone else.