I am King Solomon

sweet my birthday is on the 3rd so it's be a blast. I'm fully expecting the world to blow up on the 4th. Wait is that PST, EST, across the international dateline and in asia time. That'll suck if it is, then I won't be able to enjoy my birthday since the world will get destroyed on it.

Wait!!! why do I have to go to hell. Thats not cool. You are not a cool god. A cool god would have the celebrity bring me chocolate eclairs, and a suitcase full of non taxable money before the end of the year, like right now. Then I'm going to buy a lamborghini and show justin beiber how one really lives.

God?... I have another request for you. it would really help if you could you known, make me more impressive physically if you know what I mean. I'm getting tired of the cruel laughter. The last girl I went on a date with fell out of her seat when she saw me. Called it a hobbit or something. Why'd you do that to me. thats messed up. That was wrong homie I did nothing to you. whyd you do that and are you willing, as god, to apologize for that one. Oh and also that blind date I went on two yeas ago that still has traumatized me.

Say youre sorry. Go on I'll be waiting.

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