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Spider and key

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posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 01:46 PM
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What is it?
My value!
It is built deep within a crypt.
With dust,
And old chalices.
With dust,
And old chalices.
One and two.
What else is in here...
Is there any money?
There is an inheritance.
I will never find it!
Does someone drink down here?
Very many drink,
But they are ghosts.
Ghosts that can be repaired.
Abuse is a legend.
I want to find.
Wait for dreams to find.
A filter
That nothing can get through.
Two children.
Twins even.
Five in energy.
Energy resonating within a number.
The energy within man.
Spider.
A bite
Of sap.
An old movie,
That exists in the mind.
Inflatable ball.




posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 01:56 PM
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a reply to: brazenalderpadrescorpio

Ha!

Your poems just blow my mind man. There's is so much going on there for saying so little. Its open to so much speculation its like a word painting!

"Hmm, jolly good old bean but what do you think the artist means?"

Love it!




posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 02:37 PM
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a reply to: brazenalderpadrescorpio

Your poem was exquisite agony to me!

Gothic noir is always a joy to read.




posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 02:54 PM
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a reply to: CagliostroTheGreat

Thanks! I feel like you really understand my work, man.



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 02:57 PM
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a reply to: beansidhe

Haha. Thanks. I thought you were expressing your disapproval at first. I got ya.



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 03:07 PM
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a reply to: brazenalderpadrescorpio

I thought you'd get it!
Great poem, loved it



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 03:19 PM
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a reply to: beansidhe

I'd like to hear the opinion of a writer, how would you categorize my poetry? I sort of feel at a loss when I'm trying to describe my poetry to people. I feel like free verse is too broad a category. I sometimes tell people that it's Abstract poetry, but certain people say that there's no such thing. What would you say?



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 03:35 PM
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a reply to: brazenalderpadrescorpio

Well first off, I'll let you into a secret - I entered a writing comp here not long ago, with my first and only entry, and won it by the skin of my teeth. So your thinking me a writer is...generous to say the least.

So I suppose I'd say don't ever let people tell you who you are or what you do. There will always be someone waiting to say 'there's no such thing', but if that's how you feel it's best described then call it that. There's a lot of snobbery around writing and poetry, with people desperate to pigeon hole and categorise things. Free verse is a good description, I think.

As long as it comes from the heart, it's original and packed with imagery and movement, I love it. It's like peeking inside someone's mind - not something we're often invited to do, so it's a real privilege to read people's writing here.



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 03:57 PM
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a reply to: beansidhe

This person who told me that there's no such thing as Abstract poetry seems very bitter, it seems as if he wanted to be a poet at one point. I guess I should've figured where it was coming from. I thank you for your comments. I don't like to categorize my poetry either, but sometimes I just want people who haven't read my poetry to have a taste so that they can know what it's about before they actually read it, that's all.



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 04:03 PM
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a reply to: brazenalderpadrescorpio

Well that's the thing I suppose - who is it that's telling you these things, and what do they mean by it?
Anyway both you and the Encyclopaedia Britannica agree about abstract poetry:




Abstract poem, a term coined by Edith Sitwell to describe a poem in which the words are chosen for their aural quality rather than specifically for their sense or meaning. An example from “Popular Song” in Sitwell’s Façade (1923) follows:

The red retriever-haired satyr
Can whine and tease her and flatter,
But Lily O’Grady,
Silly and shady,
In the deep shade is a lazy lady;
Now Pompey’s dead, Homer’s read,
Heliogabalus lost his head,


I'd say yours fits the bill, wouldn't you? You can be ATS's resident abstract poet. Keep at it, I'll enjoy reading your work



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 04:12 PM
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a reply to: beansidhe

I remember googling abstract poetry before he told me that, and finding quite a few websites talking about. But after he told me that, I guess I felt weird and never bothered looking again. I notice that there are certain people that really know how to cut you down. But then again he hasn't had a very happy life to say the least. Yeah, that'd be cool if I could be the ATS abstract poet! Haha.



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 04:48 PM
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a reply to: brazenalderpadrescorpio

I enjoyed your story. And i like your style of writing as well



posted on Apr, 23 2014 @ 05:29 PM
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a reply to: TheDoctor46

Thanks. Am looking forward to reading more of your stuff, as well!



posted on Apr, 24 2014 @ 04:32 AM
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a reply to: brazenalderpadrescorpio

Was gonna respond yesterday but didn't get around to it.
Noticed you wanted some feedback today.

I think you are doing great and I enjoyed your writing.
I went and checked past poems too, of which I recognized a few from randomly reading before.

You are doing great, no sweat.
Keep it up. Like what you are thinking!



posted on Apr, 24 2014 @ 06:12 PM
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a reply to: muzzleflash

Thanks for the support! I appreciate it.









 
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