I lost my mainstream journalist job. Not only did the spurious and false charges from Mr. Rodinus regarding the chocolate that was, admittedly, on my
mouth, cause all kinds of mayhem, I discovered something that changed my entire viewpoint on these events, and my bosses couldn't handle the
Truth...They did this:
I told them this Truth, and they fired me immediately. Not only that, but some strange men in 1940's black suits, fedoras and carrying NEWSPAPERS of
all things, tried to shove me into their black, tinted window car as I was leaving the building with my pitiful box full of stuff... They were very
pale and creepy! I snapped a photo with my iphone, but alas...it came out all blurry...
I'm not even sure how I got away, but I've never run faster in my life...I am now located in my own bunker in the middle of "somewhere" after my
narrow escape. (It's much nicer than Mr. Rodiuns's Mum's basement, I might add...)
INTRODUCING: "ABBY'S UNDERGROUND - Where You Get the LowDown on the News...
*Ahem* Welcome to my first broadcast!
And now...THE TRUTH
First, the accusations that Mr. Rodinus put forth regarding said chocolate on my lips...that was from my recent analysis of the chocolate bunny ears
Destiny sent me...(sorry Destiny...I'll send you some chocolates to make up for it!) It was NOT the hostages... And speaking of the hostages...I
have some REVELATIONS regarding them...the TRUTH that got me fired from my lame-stream job...
It Just Got Real, Peeps...
What got me fired? Well, I kept hearing rumors from the conspiracy site that suddenly matched my actual real-life observations. On my
world-investigative-journalist jaunt yesterday, I managed to sneak in a few guilty moments checking out if the "crazy tin foil crowd" might actually
be on to something...
What I discovered, changed the whole game...
This is a "Chocolate Factory" for Lindt, the name on the foil of Mr. Rodinus's hostages...
The photo you are about to see, is a complete game changer in this "hostage" situation...I would not have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own
Yes. Those are factory workers who are making bunnies out of chocolate. I know, right? OUT OF CHOCOLATE!!!
The conspiracy folks were RIGHT!!! The bunnies are NOT LIVE bunnies, just chocolate effigies like the ears that Destiny sent me!!!
So, with this information we can only conclude: THERE ARE NO REAL HOSTAGES, JUST CANDY IN A FOIL WRAPPER MADE TO LOOK LIKE A CUTE LITTLE BUNNY
It would seem the "evil" Mr. Rodinus is actually playing us all for fools...and the REAL conspiracy is why the mainstream media was promoting, dare I
say fanning the flames, of this potential powder keg of a situation - I beg and plead for people to remain calm, for Bunny Vigilantes to learn the
FACTS and for the Peeps to STAND DOWN NOW.
Really people, the ONLY proper response to this:
And have a Happy, Peaceful Easter... This is AboveBoard signing off from her new bunker "somewhere" in the world. Thus concludes the first episode of
"Abby's Underground"... where you can get the lowdown on the news and more...
edit on 20-4-2014 by AboveBoard because: (no reason given)
edit on 20-4-2014 by AboveBoard because: I like to write actual
sentences that make sense...It's a thing...