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Andre Johnson severs Manhood in suicide attempt!?

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posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 08:12 PM
Sounds to me like the dude...

*puts on sunglasses*

Lost his head.


...sorry, couldn't resist.

posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 08:13 PM
Double post.
edit on 16-4-2014 by AfterInfinity because: (no reason given)

posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 08:27 PM
Maybe he was schizophrenic and it started talking to him??
Kinda like that one scene from Bruno..

posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 08:36 PM
That's not a cry for help...that's a recipe for a straitjacket and a lifetime thorazine drip!
But not to worry...he'll be out of rehab (and surgery) in time to release a new single...afterall, it's in his contract and while you may be able to cheat the Devil, you can't cheat Sony.
Even if he did a suicide, there'd still be music releases from beyond the grave for the next decade...kinda like with Tupac.
(Not to mention all those "I had sex with Andre Johnson" threads that become more prolific than "Elvis is still alive" threads)
We should just elect this guy as POTUS.
Just think about it for a moment.
He couldn't possibly be any worse than Obama and we'll know for a fact that anyone who tries to "Lewinsky" him is a liar. Think of all the billable hours we'd save in legal fees alone? It would balance the freakin' budget!

edit on 16-4-2014 by Eryiedes because: ETA

edit on 16-4-2014 by Eryiedes because: More ETA

edit on 16-4-2014 by Eryiedes because: I REALLY must stop drinking!

edit on 16-4-2014 by Eryiedes because: I'm so sorry you people have to witness this...

edit on 16-4-2014 by Eryiedes because: I have already begun a "twelve step program". Step One reads as "Drink more Jack Danials"...Steps Two through Eleven read as: "Repeat Step One"...Step Twelve reads as: "Call a Paramedic".

edit on 16-4-2014 by Eryiedes because: Genuine Typo...who knew?

edit on 16-4-2014 by Eryiedes because: You KNOW you have had too much to drink when you edit a "Reason to Edit" line...

posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 09:57 PM
Not sure about you guys, but i noticed nearly EVERY celebrity or notable public figure ends up going to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center. Most likely it's just because of the concentration of them living in that region of LA but wow, are there no other hospitals or does this one specifically exist to cater to the rich while the peons get treated at county hospitals?

posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 11:31 PM
He probably smoked some dust and flipped out. I used to know some people that smoked it. Couple of em flipped out and killed themselves. Sounds like the culprit to me.

posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 06:02 AM
Maybe he was possessed by the spirit of Ol' Dirty Bastard aka Big Baby Jesus aka Dirt McGirt aka The Specialist aka Osirus because he wasnt down with the Shaolin Stylin'

I could see ODB returning from the grave to do something like that.

posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 06:10 AM

Well I am quite sure it is not demon possession because that does not exist.

Well I am quite sure it DOES exist.
But first the mental health issues need to be addressed.
That's where these things usually lead to.
TMZ is reporting that the severed item can not be reattached.

posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 06:37 AM
reply to post by FlyersFan

Can't be re-attached? Expect more suicide attempts from him. I guess he'll have to change his name from Andre Johnson to Andre Nothing.
edit on 17-4-2014 by abe froman because: (no reason given)

posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 01:36 PM
I was just reading the other day about a !6th century Micronesian king named Isokelekel who supposedly decided to commit suicide by tying his penis to a doubled over palmtree and releasing the tree. This was sufficient to rip his gentlemen's sausage off causing him to bleed to death.

If he was especially religious perhaps he was fulfilling the "If thine right eye offend thee, cut it off." scenario like that man several years ago who gouged out his own eyes in church. I would think some underlying mental issue or drugs would be necessary for one to have the conviction to do such a thing.

posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 09:54 PM
a reply to: FlyersFan

TMZ also reported, no hard drugs were involved..
Very bizarre story..

posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 10:58 PM
Yah a fail to see the logic in this. Although logic may not have been considered in this suicide attempt. It's like cleaning your house spotless before you burn it to the ground. Why bother with all that additional effort.

posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 11:02 PM
Plus he now has to add Failure to whatever list of stuff that made him do this to himself in the first place. Not that suicide should ever be the answer, but if I was ever to choose it, I'd damn sure plan to be successful at it.

posted on Apr, 18 2014 @ 07:23 PM
a reply to: mOjOm

he was high on PCP....and I don't think they can reattach because he cut it off.... PIECE....BY....PIECE (shudders at the thought and I am a girl)

edit on 18-4-2014 by research100 because: (no reason given)

posted on Apr, 18 2014 @ 07:35 PM
a reply to: research100 it was drugs. That makes much more sense. Thanx for the update. Although I'm not sure I needed the additional info on the multiple severed pieces of Wu Tangs, Wu Wang...

Man, some drugs really are BAD!!! Really Really BAD!!!

posted on Apr, 18 2014 @ 08:40 PM
a reply to: research100

Thank God I wasn't words i might cry myself to bed tonight

posted on Apr, 18 2014 @ 08:47 PM
a reply to: mOjOm

I can see the anti drug poster now.

Here's your Johnson...Here's your Johnson on PCP....

Nooooooooooo...I didn't just say that...did I?


posted on Apr, 18 2014 @ 09:20 PM
a reply to: Destinyone

Seriously though, that may have actually worked. I remember those commercials and all the jokes about them that came after but had they done it your way, I don't think people would have been laughing or joking about it. It might even come with the added benefit of stopping people from watching the TV so much too.

I know for me personally, back when I still watched TV, whenever one of those SPCA animal abuse commercials came on I couldn't shut the TV off fast enough. Even just hearing the music at the start of it would make me rush in from another room just to stop it.

posted on Apr, 18 2014 @ 10:34 PM
a reply to: research100

I just read your link you posted and,
To think he was PCP'd out of his mind and most likely not even suicidal.
I hurt for this young, talented man. please let this be a reminder to all that..
Drugs ARE BAD!!!
edit on 18-4-2014 by DenyFlatulence because: (no reason given)

posted on Apr, 19 2014 @ 07:13 PM
a reply to: DenyFlatulence

Maybe his counselor told him that this is what happens when you smoke PCP and to be a wiseass he did, and he did. Maybe we should start telling kids that they definitely should smoke pcp and dismember the member, in the patently misguided and irresponsible hopes that they don't.

I was almost thinking that it was the football player Andre Johnson protesting against possibly having to catch passes from Johnny Football in Houston.

On another sidenote, the Wu-Tang Clan is set to record the most expensive album of all-time.

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