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Life (poem)

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posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 12:02 AM
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Life is worth living at this time.
That statement sounds like an ordinary affected statement.
However, this statement is based in reality.
Let me see…
There is the futility of reason.
There is the futility of living day to day.
There exists the wonderment of society.
There is someone always wanting to stay.
How is it that someone gathers
and another person reaps bounty?
How does something like that happen?
Does the thing in question mean that life is not worth living?
The question is, for now, left unanswered.
The question is left unanswered.
The question is left on its own, day by day.
Something is scratched up.
Something is left for dead.
That thing is useless.
Someone makes its bed.
Someone finds it useful.
Someone finds it full of hair.
It is synthesized.
And it is left for dead.
Life is useful, at times.
What does it mean to be human?
A lifeless person would ask this question.
A lifeless person that is left for dead.
There is a relentless agony
that is left for bed.
Someone is wanting to find a way
through the jungle.
Wanting to find a way through the jungle that is civilization.
What does it mean to be civilized?
If you are a businessman
that has its employees as slaves
Is that person civilized?
That person may frankly not care if he or she is civilized.
I cannot give any insight into the matter.
I am not a businessman to know this.
Am I a civilized person?
To know this, a full history
with all of its ramifications
would need to be displayed.
Only somebody who deals with information
would know something such as this.
This would have to be a person who is not necessarily a scientist.
This would have to be somebody who knows about life on an intimate level.




posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 12:12 AM
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reply to post by brazenalderpadrescorpio
 


I liked it.

Spontaneous, at times even a bit rambling but still manages to remain coherent and gripping.

Nice piece.

I give...




posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 12:28 AM
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reply to post by CagliostroTheGreat
 


Thanks. The rambling part is due to the contemporariness of the poem. I like to classify it as meta-modern. In other words, it's more modern than post-modern. I feel this going past everyone's head. Whoosh...

I wrote it some few months ago.
Thanks again for the props.



posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 12:54 AM
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Life has a poem-like substance. Life asks rhetorical questions but doesn't wait for an answer before moving on. Life seeking life, feedback, distortion, re-assembly, evolutionary by design... Life is the signature of the artist-self applied to the unfinished work.

For the etymologists out there:

life (n.) Look up life at Dictionary.com
Old English life (dative lif) "existence, lifetime, way of life, condition of being a living thing, opposite of death," from Proto-Germanic *libam (cognates: Old Norse lif "life, body," Dutch lijf "body," Old High German lib "life," German Leib "body"), properly "continuance, perseverance," from PIE *leip- "to remain, persevere, continue; stick, adhere" (see leave (v.)). Much of the modern range of meanings was present in Old English. Meaning "property which distinguishes living from non-living matter" is from 1560s. Sense of "vitality, energy" is from 1580s. Extended 1703 to "term of duration (of inanimate objects)." Source www.etymonline.com...



posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 01:00 AM
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reply to post by SayonaraJupiter
 


Thanks? I'm not sure if you're saying that you liked the poem, but I thank you for your response regardless.



posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 02:34 AM
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reply to post by brazenalderpadrescorpio
 


Nope, I got it. I fancy myself a bit of a writer as well and my poetry shares a similar form.

Though I never had a classification until now.




posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 05:19 AM
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reply to post by brazenalderpadrescorpio
 


I like it a lot. And it sure does make a lot of sense to me. Im no writer. I just like to write here and there
....Nice post



posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 05:29 AM
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reply to post by brazenalderpadrescorpio
 


I wouldn't call that a poem in any way, shape or form. It is mostly just lines of rambling statements some reasonable, some not so much so.

You would be far better served by dropping two thirds of it and tidying up the remainder.

That being said...kudos to you for at least trying and having the courage to put yourself out there.



posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 06:52 AM
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reply to post by brazenalderpadrescorpio
 


I enjoyed the read

I like how you wrote it.



posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 10:49 AM
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reply to post by midicon
 


I disagree.

"Poem", or any variation thereof, is simply a label we use to further define a piece of art we have created. The true art is in the conceptualization of the work itself. Take an abstract painting for instance, say we have a piece with several multicolored lines splashed about or better yet, say we have a painting of a soup can. The work is still a painting but its also art! Art for its own sake! "Painting" is just a label used to define the art.

I'm sure there are literati out there that will disagree but frankly I don't care. What he wrote was a poem simply because he said it was. And that is art.

Kallisti



posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 12:28 PM
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reply to post by CagliostroTheGreat
 


Calling something something doesn't really make it so. I understand where you are coming from but it's important to be honest. Of course we can have free flowing narrative without recourse to meter, cadence, rhyme or reason and still be poetic.
Just as in art...

But I do agree I was wrong, if the author writes a poem then it's a poem. Perhaps in my own way I was saying what I thought of it...sometimes I go off on one.



posted on Apr, 16 2014 @ 02:29 PM
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reply to post by midicon
 


I've actually been writing for a while now, and have toyed with off-beat forms of expression. I'm also a fine arts painter. And I just want to warn people, if you thought that this one made sense, the next one may not make sense at all. For me it's not really about making sense, it's about pure expression. I dig deep into my mind. It's pretty strange in there.



posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 09:37 AM
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brazenalderpadrescorpio
reply to post by midicon
 


I've actually been writing for a while now, and have toyed with off-beat forms of expression. I'm also a fine arts painter. And I just want to warn people, if you thought that this one made sense, the next one may not make sense at all. For me it's not really about making sense, it's about pure expression. I dig deep into my mind. It's pretty strange in there.


Poetry doesn't have to make sense, that's not what it's about...and off-beat expression is great but it can't be used as an excuse for lack of ability...for want of a better word.
I'm not aiming that at you...just making a point.

If you have been writing for some time and have presented the poem as the finished article then there is something amiss here, perhaps you just have to keep at it.
It reads like a first draft that after a few re-workings may produce something worthwhile. I mean that as encouragement not disparagement.

I think you do yourself an injustice with this free expression thing. I re-read the poem and although in general it's a bit of a mess I can also see that there are bits in there that have something about them. I did suggest dropping two thirds and tidying up what's left...I know it's only my opinion but it's good to have feedback.

Have you written anything without that free expression rambling whatever? If you have it would be nice to see it. I mean that in good way.




Life has a poem-like substance. Life asks rhetorical questions but doesn't wait for an answer before moving on. Life seeking life, feedback, distortion, re-assembly, evolutionary by design... Life is the signature of the artist-self applied to the unfinished work.


I thought that was quite poetic in it's own way.



posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 11:48 AM
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reply to post by midicon
 


I actually didn't edit it. I think that it probably makes sense not to since it's something I'm presenting as free. I'm writing a poetry book, and that I have gone over and edited at least four times.

ETA: I think that "free-expression" is not your thing. With all due respect, maybe you should stick to reading the style of poetry that you actually enjoy.
edit on 17-4-2014 by brazenalderpadrescorpio because: (no reason given)



posted on Apr, 17 2014 @ 08:47 PM
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a reply to: brazenalderpadrescorpio

I actually want to be honest. I just realized that I did edit this poem. I was getting confused with the poem I posted after this one. That one (The boo) I didn't edit. And apparently that one that I didn't edit is more of a success than the one I did edit.



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