growing out of the truth movement?

For about a year I have spent most of my free time with conspiracies, conspiracy theories, the esoteric, the occult, mind control etc. Inside of me has begun to grow a feeling that's hard to define. I look at "the skeptics" and feel alienated from them, but now I feel an increasing sense of alienation towards "the truth movement" as well. I go on youtube in search of truth and find that almost every video has an undertone of fear.

THE EVIL CABAL IS POISONING US AND HYPNOTIZING US
THE ROTHSCHILDS ARE DEVIL WORSHIPERS AND THEY OWN YOUR MIND
THE GREEDY CORRUPT ELITE ARE PULLING US ALL INTO DESTRUCTION AND ROT
THE SATANIC ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY EXPOSED

You get the idea.

I go on red ice and see the same undertone in the attitude of the host and most of the guests.

I get the feeling that I'm facing a lot of one-sided information.

If only I could read faster and had higher intelligence maybe I wouldn't feel so stuck in the undergrowth of the information landscape I'm trying to navigate. I feel like a monkey journeying through the undergrowth of the rainforest. But lately I've been feeling that I get glimpses of what's above the treetops and beyond the valley, while I feel like most people I encounter are hopelessly ignorant of anything outside of the undergrowth. Either that or they have had some kind of perception of that which lies beyond the undergrowth but their perception of it and attitude towards it is very colored by their paradigm, the perspective they are stuck in.

I just read this thread:

www.abovetopsecret.com...

And when I read it I couldn't help but feel that either all or almost all of the posters there are less enlightened than I am. I'm not trying to be arrogant. I'm just being honest about what sensations I get. I feel as if I am Neo in the Matrix and these people have not yet become Neo. Either that or they have gone through some of the events that Neo goes through but less than I have. I might be wrong of course.

I still spend time on conspiracy forums and listen to red ice and similar things. But mostly to get inspiration about what to study.

Anyone else having the same feelings or thoughts as me?

Sometimes I wish that Google is run by extraterrestrials and that they would abduct me already. Life in the undergrowth is laborious and dreary to the extent that it feels like a torture chamber they put you in and threw away the key.

One of the most interesting things I have come across is Vipassana meditation. I'm reading a book on it now called Mindfulness in Plain English, and I'm trying to meditate.

Why is my computer extremely slow right now? It's driving me crazy, honestly.



(the monkey metaphor might not be that great since as far as I know monkeys climb the trees and aren't in the undergrowth all the time, but you get the idea...)

reply to post by introspectionist


It sounds a wee bit like you're burnt out, and that it might be time to take a step sideways for a while. If you constantly immerse yourself in conspiracies and wondering about such like, you don't have a balanced view of the world.

Sometimes I wish that Google is run by extraterrestrials and that they would abduct me already. Life in the undergrowth is laborious and dreary to the extent that it feels like a torture chamber they put you in and threw away the key.

One of the most interesting things I have come across is Vipassana meditation. I'm reading a book on it now called Mindfulness in Plain English, and I'm trying to meditate.

If life feels laborious and dreary, could it be that too much of your energies are focussed in one direction, and that there is not enough balance in your life? There should still be room to laugh and have fun. I'm glad you're thinking about mindfulness, there is a growing body of evidence to support it's usefulness.
I don't know if this reply is helpful to you or not, but it's what came to mind.

reply to post by introspectionist


If freedom requires at some stage passing over a bridge into a world where you must travel alone, then belonging to any movement wont get you there. Mabey your at that bridge, and mabey you will have the power to cross it and mabey you wont.

Keep at it. The truth will come to those who search it out.

Look at Jesus, He spread His Fathers Word, asked us to turn the other cheek, give caesar what is Caesar's and God what is Gods.
Jesus did amazing things like heal the sick, raised the dead, feed the people.

What did the people do to him in the end? How did he feel about the way He was treated?

Knowledge is power, so keep at it and reap the end rewards. Life is a blink of an eye. What happens after death is what matters.

We will all eventually die, that's for sure!

Will you die with truth or lies?

Personally I wouldn't waste my time with it, it will only require your investment of time and money with no return.

I can remember when the Assassination Records Review Board (ARRB) released the 5 volume assessment and the enormity of the report was somewhat depressing. I kept thinking why am I getting into this after I already promised myself after the 26 volumes of the Warren report I would give this stuff up. It was burn out to the nth degree and I knew at least one volume is going to be totally over my head-1960's movie technology and processing-and I just wanted to forget it and move on.

However-as before-I broke out Carl Sagan's epic Cosmos and read it for the 100th time and I felt re-energized for my search for the truth.

That would be my advise. It's the classic 'I want to believe'

beansidhe
reply to post by introspectionist

 

It sounds a wee bit like you're burnt out, and that it might be time to take a step sideways for a while. If you constantly immerse yourself in conspiracies and wondering about such like, you don't have a balanced view of the world.

Sometimes I wish that Google is run by extraterrestrials and that they would abduct me already. Life in the undergrowth is laborious and dreary to the extent that it feels like a torture chamber they put you in and threw away the key.

One of the most interesting things I have come across is Vipassana meditation. I'm reading a book on it now called Mindfulness in Plain English, and I'm trying to meditate.

If life feels laborious and dreary, could it be that too much of your energies are focussed in one direction, and that there is not enough balance in your life? There should still be room to laugh and have fun. I'm glad you're thinking about mindfulness, there is a growing body of evidence to support it's usefulness.
I don't know if this reply is helpful to you or not, but it's what came to mind.

Thanks. I'm not sure if I'm burnt out. Paranoid, lonely and feeling mad most of the time, yes. But burnt out? Maybe. Not sure.

AthlonSavage
reply to post by introspectionist

 

If freedom requires at some stage passing over a bridge into a world where you must travel alone, then belonging to any movement wont get you there. Mabey your at that bridge, and mabey you will have the power to cross it and mabey you wont.

I was just thinking about this yesterday. It feels like I am progressing on the spiritual journey. I was thinking about the leap of faith that is allegorically shown in the Matrix and whether or not I'll progress. I began to read another interesting book called How To Know Higher Worlds. I'm almost sure it was in that book they say that during the initiatic path you reach stages where you are left with no real guidance and has to follow nothing but your heart. Maybe I'm in one of those now, because I feel lonely and left with no real guidance of what to do and what not to do.

2.bp.blogspot.com...

reply to post by introspectionist

Maybe I'm in one of those now, because I feel lonely and left with no real guidance of what to do and what not to do. - See more at:

The path of freedom is the path of heart and no one ever said it was gonna be easy to be free.

spooky24
I can remember when the Assassination Records Review Board (ARRB) released the 5 volume assessment and the enormity of the report was somewhat depressing. I kept thinking why am I getting into this after I already promised myself after the 26 volumes of the Warren report I would give this stuff up. It was burn out to the nth degree and I knew at least one volume is going to be totally over my head-1960's movie technology and processing-and I just wanted to forget it and move on.

However-as before-I broke out Carl Sagan's epic Cosmos and read it for the 100th time and I felt re-energized for my search for the truth.

That would be my advise. It's the classic 'I want to believe'

Interesting. I understand how you feel. I have a hypothesis. It is that the truth seeker will never be able to attain full understanding or knowledge of that which he is trying to understand in the way he thinks. But the seeking for truth in and of itself is like a signal sent off to God that you are trying your best. Then, by means of the Holy Spirit, God actually molds your cosmos in ways that lead you to where he wants you to be led, he makes you "stumble across" things without you knowing who put it there. He has the power to elevate you, to open your eyes, to liberate you. You can only show your will. He changes the program. And this is where spiritual vision comes in. This is where the materialist is distinguished from those who, in Plato's words, "have climbed out of the cave", where Neo is distinguished from the agents.

AthlonSavage
Personally I wouldn't waste my time with it, it will only require your investment of time and money with no return.

Who shouldn't waste their time with what?

reply to post by introspectionist


Congratulations! You are beginning to take responsibility for the world you live in. Your life is not determined by an evil cabal, but by your own choices. Live well!

reply to post by introspectionist


with someone/s elses path to freedom

To me truth seeking in conspiracies is a rather necessary step on the way to get out of the mind prison to achieve greater wisdom.
Its use is to gain power, to get reason to not go with the flow.
Of course most info out there is pretty wrong. You seek the right parts and improve your logics of extracting relevant information between the lines to find more and find the means to seek out wrong logics within yourself and everyone else more quickly. You also spread your conclusions to others who will also gain power to become truth seekers.
Those who haven't gained an awareness can usually not understand those who have gained too much awareness once they forgot how to talk to the lower and which words will trigger them to stop listening or diving into fantasies.

On the next step those conspiracy people will look like the low, crazy ones, yet they are interesting, because they learned to absorb the real wisdom mechanisms and knowledge, so people as I can teach them. Not because some conspiracies would not be logical, but, because some of them are not relevant.
Pointing the finger and saying - this kind of world would be better! Or protesting .. or freeing a country .. would have no effect once you realize the structure behind those conspiracies. Countries were always immediately reconquered. Make up your mind who it is best to care for and seek the best possible actions while reverse engineering a structure behind information and gaining more data by extracting details that multiple chances of what could be true have in common. In the end it will be to care for all, but before you understand why, you cannot create a stable brain structure with this goal.

And a hint - most info out there might be wrong, but once you understood parts, you have the means to search for specifically people who realize the same to rise yourself further by searching for their contents. But stay skeptic, of course; you can always become more accurate. However let that not deny things completely, always running away.

The reason for there to be so many omg, satanic!! titles is, that they are also truth seekers; beginners; while the wisest have taken the next step already, though still providing findings to seekers who spread it. This is yet another wisdom to find. Seeing filters bringing people to specific places.

There are many people out there trying to guide you, but before you haven't gone through all these awareness levels you will rather not hear the higher ones.
Good luck on your journey