Deathbed consciousness question

Hi i hope this is the right spot for this my brain is very tired right now but i figure it would fit in this category.

So im wondering what people think based on studies done or otherwise what their opinions are on someone who has slipped in to a coma state ( due to old age mainly and everything failing) being aware of everything around them just because their eyes are closed does that mean theyre just in a deep sleep or otherwise?

I hope my question makes sense the reason i ask is because ive just returned home from saying goodbye to my Nonno he has had 3 strokes this month, the otherday he couldnt breathe and then went to sleep and never really woke up again he was on high doses of morphene to try help his lungs but treatment failed today my family decided to stop treatment and start palliative care so at 1:30pm today everything was turned off he has oxygen going in his nose and a small dose of morphene and another drug i have forgotten the name of but thats it no fluids nothing his lungs are filling everything is failing thats it i spent all yesterday and yeaterday evening and now this evening there i talked to him alot when i was there i just want to know if people think they still know whats going on i want too hear NDE anything i guess im just looking to know he knew i was there with him holding his hand.. No one can really answer that but i heard science is proving alot now i noticed alot of REM going on with him too..

He'll be OK. This life if he wasn't responding to you physically it's because he wasn't there physically one way or another he heardt you or felt your positive energy.

reply to post by Shana91aus


When I was in a coma I had some awareness. I knew I was in a hospital, but not why. I knew my friend was there and that people were taking care of me. It was dark, the temperature felt perfect, there was no pressure on any part of my body, and no pain. I wasn't afraid; it was the most peaceful I ever felt.


I wasn't supposed to survive, Harborview told the family I lived with at the time to go ahead and make funeral arrangements. Harborview is a trauma center in Seattle.

He knows you were there and care. I'm so sorry Honey.

reply to post by Shana91aus


I'm sorry to hear about your Nonno. Going through something like this is very difficult. I had similar experiences when both of my parents got very sick at nearly the same time (both were diagnosed with terminal cancers of different types) and ultimately passed away within days of each other. I mention it because I learned some interesting things while caring for them - especially near the end - that may prove helpful to you.

Have you ever talked with any Hospice nurses about this?

They are an incredible group of people that have seen much of this "twilight" period. And that's exactly what they called it.

Both of my parents went through these periods where they were neither here nor there...so to speak. According to one of the Hospice nurses I became very close with afterwards, they are actually both here *and* there. A part of them is still here with us, a part of them is in the place that comes next and a larger part is in a transitional place where they are quietly very busy preparing themselves for what's next and making peace with who and what they are and the lives that they've lived.

On a final note, none of the Hospice nurses every talked about this or brought it up on their own, but would gladly talk about it when asked.

If you have an opportunity to speak with a Hospice nurse, I highly recommend it. And if you do so, please tell them I said thanks too.

I hope this helps in some small way.

Mom died at 94 after a long battle with parkinsons disease....
She was in a vegetive state for a while before the end, and the family was called from far and wide to return to say goodbye.
Though she couldn't talk, or even swallow....she recognized every one of her children and acknowledged their presence in small ways...
Shortly, after the last of us arrived and individually spoke with her....she passed peacefully....
I am convinced that she was aware of us and reacted to us on an individual basis even though she was never conscious in the normal sense....

This is one of the hardest things about life.
Losing someone we love and not knowing what's really 'happening' beyond them dying is so excruciating.

I've heard on good authority (grief counseling/hospice workers/terminal ward nurses, etc) that the hearing is the last thing to go.
I'm sure he felt you there, your love was being transmitted, and was recieved.

My heart goes out to you, dear, for the pain and change this event brings.
You'll see him again. Keep us posted.

Honestly there is no way to really know on a individual basis, but continue to talk to him now and after he is free from his mortal coil. While the information on comas can be all over the place, I've done an insane amount of research on what comes next and due to that I lean towards continuance and their ability to visit and such. I don't do anything like praying but I wish you grace during this difficult time.

I just want to say thankyou so much to everyone who replied, i will be back tomorrow to post more my nonno passed away tonight i raced to be there, i was too late but i did sit with him afterwards for a little while i was on my own its the middle of the night here and for some reason none of my family were there with him.

Thankyou all so much i will he back to discuss this more my minds just not to good at the moment that was the hardest thing ive ever been through im so uneasy right now your answers have greatly helped me and honestly knowing there is people who know how i feel right now even, means alot the people in my family are very rough around the edges they dont deal with stuff well or talk about it its hard..

reply to post by tenfor


Yeah i think you are right, i hope he did anyway! Surely there would still be some kind of awareness.

reply to post by ahimsa


Wow thats pretty amazing im so glad you survived and your story has brought comfort to me so thankyou, were you on any pain medications or anything? I was thinking with them giving him so much morphene that would have maybe altered things a little and just put him in a deep sleep like state but with being so close to death who really knows how his brain would be functioning. Again really glad you came through that im sure it changed your prespective on alot of things.

reply to post by Riffrafter



Thankyou it did help me! Are hospice nurses similar too palliative carers? I assume they would be given theyre dealing with the same sort of care, i did speak with a palliative carer and she was very comforting it would take very strong people to do that job but i think being surrounded by it everyday would give them a lot greater understanding of death and the build up to it i have actually read places in the past couple days about this and alot of strange phenomena that nurses have experienced in that time i don't know how much truth is to what i have read but it still gives me comfort.
Im so sorry to hear about the loss of your parents and so close together that time must have been tragic and heartbreaking for you im sure, im finding this hard enough can not even imagine losing my parents thankyou for sharing your thoughts!

reply to post by stirling


That was very much like what my nonno was like his eyes were closed though but that doesn't mean he wasn't aware, just like your mother was im glad you were all able to have your individual time with her it does help in a small way to have that time with them doesn't it.

reply to post by BuzzyWigs


Yeah i think theres truth there that the hearing is last to go, i noticed the day before he passed when i was stroking his shoulder and holding his hand i had my head near his shoulder and sometimes he would move his head towards mine but at the same time it was like he was trying to get up (this is before palliative care started) but i got the feeling maybe he could hear but not long after that he stopped doing that and it was like he moved to a deeper sleep.. Yes! Not knowing what was happening or if he is in a afterlife now if death really is just death is the hardest thing its harder than any part of this i think, i told him before he went but when he was still in a unconscious state that he had to give me a sign that he was ok on the other side, i hope i get something, i do believe in the paranormal well now going through this im looking at things alot differently though

reply to post by Strayed


My research seems to be leading me to the same conclusion as yours i would like to know how reliable this Robert Lanza's information is News link i think there is a thread on it i saw a few weeks back i will have to check out. If he were right that would explain alot. I hope he can visit me all i really have is hope though but its better to be having hope and being positive than not and being negative which im usually pretty good at. Thankyou!