Cry for Help (Poem)

The nicotine is sticking to the chandalier glass.
I'd get it cleaned, but woe is me, I cannot get the staff.

And that's not all, my Porsche is broke, some light came on, said 'fuel',
Oh, why does God do this to me? Why God? Why be so cruel?

To top it off my Jimmy Choo's are standard package mail,
I'd type the order out again but, Oh! My precious nails!

My cook thinks she can get away with fish and cheese on crackers,
But where's the roe, you stupid crow? My God! I'm gonna slap 'er!

The tea-maid too, the useless fool, or 'Chocolate teapot-maid'.
Earl Grey is not a bedtime drink! No wonder you're not paid!

My drivers late, or was it dead? I can't recall the tweet,
But either way I will be late to get my bum 'ole bleached.

You think that's bad? My Butler popped a cork into his eye,
So now I have to go without, my mouth is really dry.

My maid said I should 'go away', my woes would be forgot,
But how could I go out today? There's drizzle on my yacht.

No caviar, no pallid rim, no camomile infusion,
The only problem I don't have is one of grand delusion.

reply to post by Tsu322


WOW Tsu!!! That's Totally Awesome!!! Loved it. Very Good Girl!
S+F for You!!!!!!

reply to post by Tsu322


I normally don't care for poetry, but that was great. Thanks for the smile you put on my face.

reply to post by Tsu322


That was a real treat, brought a smile to my face...

Thanks for a slice of sunshine on this cloudy day.

Des

reply to post by SyxPak


Haha, thank you Syx, notice how I have 9 rhyming cuplets?

Hi Ahimsa and Destiny, glad I could make you smile!

reply to post by Tsu322


Tsu, no I didn't see that, till ya mentioned it!
(You do that for me by any chance, or did it just work out that way...HMmmmmmm?)
Edit: And OMG, the time you posted, 6:03=9, the time of my reply, 7:02=9......WTF!!??!???!!!!

reply to post by Tsu322


Now THAT is a top class poem. It is full of satire, the perfect mixture of humour and venom... I absolutely love it!

reply to post by Tsu322


Oh the problems that befall the wealthy,

May they stab each other to death with silver cutlery.

Couldn't resist, you inspired me.

reply to post by Tsu322


Thanks for bringing to light such a honest assessment of how bad some of us people really have it.

Some just don't know the pains we have to deal with day to day.

reply to post by Tsu322


That was terrific!

I enjoyed it so much, I had to read it again - and I never do that.



Look forward to seeing more of your work...

I enjoyed this as well dear friend!!

reply to post by SyxPak


Hi Syx, no, I meant to do eight but I was all over the place. I didn't realise until I was reordering it haha.

To everyone else, thank you for your lovely comments, you are all very kind. Either that or vengeful like me.

I really enjoyed that. I am a bit illiterate and usually don't "get" poetry but that is soooooo clever!

Or maybe I am - since it is one of the only poems I have ever "got" straight away it is making me feel brilliantly clever, so thank you for writing something that makes me feel so awesomely intelligent.

And thanks for the laugh too.

Mura

a reply to: Tsu322

Wonderful poem, loved it from start to finish. Thanks for posting!

a reply to: Tsu322

Sis!!!!
That is SO damn funny!! Really clever.
Why aren't you getting paid to write somewhere? You should be...I would pay to read it!

All I have right now though, is a star...a flag...and a *big squishy hug*.

luv,
jaky

a reply to: Tsu322

That was really good! Loved the humor. That person has it rough!!

a reply to: Tsu322

Tsu, WE ALL REALLY MISS YOU!!!!!!