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Gold walks into a bar. The bartender yells "AU! Get out!"
Why are chemists never able to prank their friends? They lack the element of surprise!
heisenberg is pulled over. "Do you have any idea how fast you were going?" asks the policeman. H: "No. But, I know where I am."
The past, the present and the future all walk into a bar at the same time. After a few minutes, the bartender says "It's getting really tense in here."