posted on Mar, 30 2014 @ 08:09 AM
I think it's time to admit the truth to myself and to everyone reading this.
My wife is trying to kill me.
It's not being done by knives, guns, poisons, weapons of mass destruction. It is a deep dark conspiracy that all women are apart of. This is why
women live longer than men.
They kill us.
This morning I woke up to face the fact that I have succumbed to the man-flu again. This is a direct result of a curse placed on me by my wife who is
obviously a secretly practicing witch.
Through a carefully planned out attack disguised as affection, she has manipulated me into accepting her affections while infecting me with one of the
most debilitating diseases known to mankind. Through my delirium, I have managed to piece together the evil plot to destroy all of mankind.
All women secretly plan on killing men.
Women meet and exchange information in changing rooms at Target and TJ Max. Coded messages are sent out in shoe boxes and in coupons. They meet in
women's toilets (that's why they travel in groups) to perform ancient rituals meant to further the destruction of manhood, maleness, manliness,
She (my wife) now waits for me in the other room. She has (what she says) a small jar of Vicks that (she says) she wants to place on my back. I
think that she uses it to place runes on me to further my descent into illness and despair.
Let this be a warning to all men. It is probably too late for me now.
Pray for me.